Makoeyes987
Listen closely, there is meaning in my words.
- AKA
- Smooth Criminal
I'll tell you about my experience.
August 15, Sensation and Perception Summer Class. It seemed to be a normal enough day. As usual, everyone in class was either taking obsessive-compulsive notes or was in a zombie-like daze of boredom. The teacher, off on her random, irreverent tangent, was paying little attention to my row.
A friend next to me turns his head. "Hey did you get Dirge of Cerberus?"he asked nonchalantly. "No." I answered, figuring I'd pick it up later that day.
Little did I know this game would change my life forever.
"Did you hear about its mechanics?" "No." I replied, eager to cut to the chase regarding it's gameplay. "It's so cool. However its got over the shoulder camera angles and you can't shoot and jump... at the same time....."
There was a brief moment of silence, in which the sheer shittiness of the gameplay settled in, in his head, after saying it out loud. No-one in the room could believe a shooter that abhorrent could be spawned on our fair earth. The lecture stopped. It felt as if claws of stupidity were tearing at my mind.
Suddenly, the girl behind me committed suicide on the spot. Full scale riots broke out over the tri-state area, with murders, looting, and rape. Cries of "How could Vincent play so horrible? What god would allow this?" could be heard as people lept from rooftops. The DG-AI riots had begun.
The area had to be carpet-bombed by the Air force in order to quell the riots and make sure no traces of the horrid shooter escaped the infected area. The entire state of New York was quarantined, and everything we ever held dear was either bombed or destroyed by the insipid setup and lack of Multiplayer mode.
A little girl next to me said she believed things couldn't possibly get worse. When her brother beat the game, he ate their mother, burned down their house and killed himself.
Suddenly, the sounds of a million infants shrieking pierced the air. A hundred armed demon with a thousand unpronounceable names rose from a fissure in the earth. "I have been summoned to your meager plane from the horror of the unspeakable shooters. I Gorros*lejldkrakish'urtszar, the aberration who was never meant to be, shall now devour the universe."spoke the horror with it's three-hundred maws.
"Good going." I said to Takayoshi Nakazato, who had miraculously survived up to this point. "How was I supposed to know the game would summon a nameless horror from the beginning of time?" I shouted, rage in my voice. "What good did you possibly believe could come of that!"
Gorros*lejldkrakish'urtszar devoured the universe and shat it out as a cosmic dung pile. The end.
Where were you?
August 15, Sensation and Perception Summer Class. It seemed to be a normal enough day. As usual, everyone in class was either taking obsessive-compulsive notes or was in a zombie-like daze of boredom. The teacher, off on her random, irreverent tangent, was paying little attention to my row.
A friend next to me turns his head. "Hey did you get Dirge of Cerberus?"he asked nonchalantly. "No." I answered, figuring I'd pick it up later that day.
Little did I know this game would change my life forever.
"Did you hear about its mechanics?" "No." I replied, eager to cut to the chase regarding it's gameplay. "It's so cool. However its got over the shoulder camera angles and you can't shoot and jump... at the same time....."
There was a brief moment of silence, in which the sheer shittiness of the gameplay settled in, in his head, after saying it out loud. No-one in the room could believe a shooter that abhorrent could be spawned on our fair earth. The lecture stopped. It felt as if claws of stupidity were tearing at my mind.
Suddenly, the girl behind me committed suicide on the spot. Full scale riots broke out over the tri-state area, with murders, looting, and rape. Cries of "How could Vincent play so horrible? What god would allow this?" could be heard as people lept from rooftops. The DG-AI riots had begun.
The area had to be carpet-bombed by the Air force in order to quell the riots and make sure no traces of the horrid shooter escaped the infected area. The entire state of New York was quarantined, and everything we ever held dear was either bombed or destroyed by the insipid setup and lack of Multiplayer mode.
A little girl next to me said she believed things couldn't possibly get worse. When her brother beat the game, he ate their mother, burned down their house and killed himself.
Suddenly, the sounds of a million infants shrieking pierced the air. A hundred armed demon with a thousand unpronounceable names rose from a fissure in the earth. "I have been summoned to your meager plane from the horror of the unspeakable shooters. I Gorros*lejldkrakish'urtszar, the aberration who was never meant to be, shall now devour the universe."spoke the horror with it's three-hundred maws.
"Good going." I said to Takayoshi Nakazato, who had miraculously survived up to this point. "How was I supposed to know the game would summon a nameless horror from the beginning of time?" I shouted, rage in my voice. "What good did you possibly believe could come of that!"
Gorros*lejldkrakish'urtszar devoured the universe and shat it out as a cosmic dung pile. The end.
Where were you?
