I'm off to North America, bai
- Thread starter Lex
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Lex
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My assessment of Canada so far is as follows:
Landing on the plane: I can see shit for miles. How is this land even real. Where are all the hills.
Baggage claim: that old joke about how North American people don't know what queues are wasn't actually sarcasm. Everything is so ridiculously disorganised what the actual fuck
Getting through customs: "omg you've certainly had life events", "I thought Canadians were supposed to be nice", "well you're different from your passport photo", "still got it though"
- constant Grindr and tinder beeping, apparently the North Americans like their Scottish booty. We shall find out.
- apparently Canadians cross the border to buy petrol (gas) because it's cheaper. They've got a fucking cheek, it's 50 cents a litre. It's literally £1.20 a litre in the UK. That's around 2 dollars a litre. Wtf.
- I assumed you'd all be vaguely Eco-friendly but I was completely mistaken. Your smallest vehicle is larger than the largest vehicle in the UK. 3.8 litre engines!? What the fuck? The land is all flat, why the fuck do you need that. They go UP to 2.0 in the UK. Such environmental destruction
- I have literally seen at least 15 people I would like to have sex with on a 10 minute drive
- I went to wal-Mart!
- got a mocha from Tim hortons. It was really tasty
- so much about this place is unoptimised
- everything's pretty cool so far
Landing on the plane: I can see shit for miles. How is this land even real. Where are all the hills.
Baggage claim: that old joke about how North American people don't know what queues are wasn't actually sarcasm. Everything is so ridiculously disorganised what the actual fuck
Getting through customs: "omg you've certainly had life events", "I thought Canadians were supposed to be nice", "well you're different from your passport photo", "still got it though"
- constant Grindr and tinder beeping, apparently the North Americans like their Scottish booty. We shall find out.
- apparently Canadians cross the border to buy petrol (gas) because it's cheaper. They've got a fucking cheek, it's 50 cents a litre. It's literally £1.20 a litre in the UK. That's around 2 dollars a litre. Wtf.
- I assumed you'd all be vaguely Eco-friendly but I was completely mistaken. Your smallest vehicle is larger than the largest vehicle in the UK. 3.8 litre engines!? What the fuck? The land is all flat, why the fuck do you need that. They go UP to 2.0 in the UK. Such environmental destruction
- I have literally seen at least 15 people I would like to have sex with on a 10 minute drive
- I went to wal-Mart!
- got a mocha from Tim hortons. It was really tasty
- so much about this place is unoptimised
- everything's pretty cool so far
LicoriceAllsorts
Donator
Lex said said:
Never was a truer word spoken.
When I first left Canada to live in England, I was startled by how deceptive distances were - like an optical illusion. I'd set out to walk to a distant hill, thinking it would be take me an hour, and in fifteen minutes I'd be there.
The Canadian countryside is beautiful, but the way it's been developed demonstrates zero feeling for beauty: strip malls, highways, electricity pylons, and endless cookie cutter housing developments.
Cthulhu
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- Yop
You just don't understand its own kind of art and beauty~
I've been Yankside er, three times, I can't say I found much (besides that arch thing in St. Louis) visually appealing, 
Lex
Administrator
In terms of visually appealing, in comparison to the UK the houses are all really individual and have their own character (at least in my cousins very nice neighborhood here in St. Catharines).
I was worried there'd be no gays here (in this city specifically). I was very wrong. The rate at which Canadian men have been propositioning me, and the way they've done it (I.e. No doublespeak, alarmingly straightforward) has really caught me off guard. It's weird.
Canadians can't fucking drive. At all. Also, I encountered my first oh shit moment while driving today; a 4: way stop junction (these make zero sense, it should just be a give way). Apparently you're supposed to go out in the order that you arrived? So you have to look at every junction and memorise each car and also when it actually got to the junction? What? It's REALLY stupid.
I have more to say but I'm super tired I went to Niagara Falls today
Also it's Victoria Day tomorrow and I'm currently standing on my cousin's front porch watching all the neighbours set off their fireworks
Pretty coo
I was worried there'd be no gays here (in this city specifically). I was very wrong. The rate at which Canadian men have been propositioning me, and the way they've done it (I.e. No doublespeak, alarmingly straightforward) has really caught me off guard. It's weird.
Canadians can't fucking drive. At all. Also, I encountered my first oh shit moment while driving today; a 4: way stop junction (these make zero sense, it should just be a give way). Apparently you're supposed to go out in the order that you arrived? So you have to look at every junction and memorise each car and also when it actually got to the junction? What? It's REALLY stupid.
I have more to say but I'm super tired I went to Niagara Falls today
Also it's Victoria Day tomorrow and I'm currently standing on my cousin's front porch watching all the neighbours set off their fireworks
Pretty coo
Last edited:
Lex
Administrator
No seriously channy, those four way junctions are ridiculously stupid. There should be two stops and one through-road. Other alternatives include traffic lights and roundabouts, all of which would be safer. The problem is that it requires concentration and attention, and Canadian drivers have neither of those things with the additional bonus of no courteousy to other drivers. It doesnt work because not a single person gives a fuck about the actual order and they all just go whenever they feel like it. It's crazy.
Another thing is that undertaking isn't even a concept on the highways. People are allowed to undercut you and go at any speed in any lane. These are all minor gripes really, I'm genuinely not surprised at the state of the driving because the cars are all automatic and so easy to drive that every idiot is pretty much on the road. Also it's weird that I can just drive my cousin's car without having to go through any official body or insurance process whatsoever. Because I'm over 25 I'm covered as an additional driver under her insurance, and my British license is fine to use here. Except I don't think it should be, because the rules of the road are so different. Like, you can make right turns even when traffic lights are red. What.
Another thing is that undertaking isn't even a concept on the highways. People are allowed to undercut you and go at any speed in any lane. These are all minor gripes really, I'm genuinely not surprised at the state of the driving because the cars are all automatic and so easy to drive that every idiot is pretty much on the road. Also it's weird that I can just drive my cousin's car without having to go through any official body or insurance process whatsoever. Because I'm over 25 I'm covered as an additional driver under her insurance, and my British license is fine to use here. Except I don't think it should be, because the rules of the road are so different. Like, you can make right turns even when traffic lights are red. What.
Lex
Administrator
Oh Canadian people:
Generally have been nice. One thing that's weird is that there are a shitload of first/second generation children of British immigrants, two of which independently warned me of the same thing. They said we buy rounds and shit at the bar, and "pure Canadians" don't really do that so they'll take and just fuck off without buying a round or whatever. Culture differences I guess XD.
Oh yesterday I was in a bar and a visiting American told me my accent wasn't Scottish. OK then dude.
My cousins are really trying to sell me the life here. They want me to move out (they have a huge house and I could live with them to get started). Being here is kind of me testing the waters. I know if it's something I did I'd end up living in a city for proximity to LGBT stuff.
Generally have been nice. One thing that's weird is that there are a shitload of first/second generation children of British immigrants, two of which independently warned me of the same thing. They said we buy rounds and shit at the bar, and "pure Canadians" don't really do that so they'll take and just fuck off without buying a round or whatever. Culture differences I guess XD.
Oh yesterday I was in a bar and a visiting American told me my accent wasn't Scottish. OK then dude.
My cousins are really trying to sell me the life here. They want me to move out (they have a huge house and I could live with them to get started). Being here is kind of me testing the waters. I know if it's something I did I'd end up living in a city for proximity to LGBT stuff.
trash panda
---m(O.O)gle---
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- Howl
Lex, I fully agree with you on the 4-way intersection thing. I come across four of them on my way to/from work every day and there are so many times where I pull up at the exact same time as another car and I'm like dammit...let me keep rolling forward just a little bit so it becomes apparent that one of us was at a complete stop after the other. That doesn't always help though.
There are also times when someone gets there first and I'm waiting for them to go since it's their turn, and they don't go and we stare at each other for a few seconds and they're obviously not going anywhere....so I go...and then they decide to go at the same time...FFS.
There are also times when someone gets there first and I'm waiting for them to go since it's their turn, and they don't go and we stare at each other for a few seconds and they're obviously not going anywhere....so I go...and then they decide to go at the same time...FFS.
LicoriceAllsorts
Donator
You'd like Toronto. I don't know if gay pride is your thing or if you'd still be there at the end of June, but it's a huge deal in the city:
http://www.pridetoronto.com/
You are so right about the driving and the automatic cars. There is never a day when there isn't an accident on the highway.
Lex
Administrator
I refuse to do it. There are a few instances where it's happened and I've just sat there not moving. Like I just won't do it, nope nope nope. Danger.
Other than that the driving has been OK. Really easy even. But it's that way where it's so easy that it's no wonder the drivers are discourteous/ mentalists. I also don't understand the need for all the pick up trucks and shit. The land is completely flat here, it's so uneconomical.
But anyway moar stuff what have I done
Been scoping out the gaynadians on Tinder and Grindr and the like, that's a hoot.
Re: Toronto, going on a night out there some time before I leave. I won't be here at the end of June so I'll miss official pride (damn), but apparently June is "pride month" in Toronto so I'll probably hit that up at the time haha
Other than that the driving has been OK. Really easy even. But it's that way where it's so easy that it's no wonder the drivers are discourteous/ mentalists. I also don't understand the need for all the pick up trucks and shit. The land is completely flat here, it's so uneconomical.
But anyway moar stuff what have I done
Been scoping out the gaynadians on Tinder and Grindr and the like, that's a hoot.
Re: Toronto, going on a night out there some time before I leave. I won't be here at the end of June so I'll miss official pride (damn), but apparently June is "pride month" in Toronto so I'll probably hit that up at the time haha
Channy
Bad Habit
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- Ruby Rose, Lucy
Cthulhu
Administrator
- AKA
- Yop
At least with roundabouts there's (realistically) only one side you can be run over from,
Dutch roundabouts are worse, those sometimes have pedestrian and bicycle crossings too, where you have to give way both entering and leaving the roundabout. Which is, given it's NL, like a meter across diagonally.
here is a larger variant DO NOT SEE!
Dutch roundabouts are worse, those sometimes have pedestrian and bicycle crossings too, where you have to give way both entering and leaving the roundabout. Which is, given it's NL, like a meter across diagonally.
here is a larger variant DO NOT SEE!
Lex
Administrator
Idk like what's been happening today
Gave a random Canadian a cigarette when he asked for it outside this pub and he said "I'll hit you up on Grindr" haha yasss
He was tattood and stuff. A lot of them wear vests and have tattoos. What's that all about. I thought this was Canada not the Bronx. Hot as fuck though, boner central
Kinda drunk
Gave a random Canadian a cigarette when he asked for it outside this pub and he said "I'll hit you up on Grindr" haha yasss
He was tattood and stuff. A lot of them wear vests and have tattoos. What's that all about. I thought this was Canada not the Bronx. Hot as fuck though, boner central
Kinda drunk
