The Elite Order of Cloud
- Thread starter Tennyo
- Start date
Shademp
420
Official posters.
http://na.square-enix.com/ff7psn/
Here you can find the classic wallpaper of Cloud watching the Shinra HQ.
http://na.square-enix.com/ff7acc/
The poster for Cloud, which is also in your sig.
Btw, take a look at this oldie:
Then compare with the standard one.
Ain't it fascinating to know that Cloud's Buster Sword used to be longer, have only one Materia slot, and that his CG model was way more primitive?
Also, he is holding the edge of the sword the wrong way!
Edit: Also noticed now that he doesn't have a glove on his right hand in that older shot.
http://na.square-enix.com/ff7psn/
Here you can find the classic wallpaper of Cloud watching the Shinra HQ.
http://na.square-enix.com/ff7acc/
The poster for Cloud, which is also in your sig.
Btw, take a look at this oldie:
Then compare with the standard one.
Ain't it fascinating to know that Cloud's Buster Sword used to be longer, have only one Materia slot, and that his CG model was way more primitive?
Also, he is holding the edge of the sword the wrong way!
Edit: Also noticed now that he doesn't have a glove on his right hand in that older shot.
Last edited:
ForceStealer
Double Growth
Which they have unfortunately kept for Dissidia. *grumble*
That's pretty neat though, I never saw that before.
Tennyo
Higher Further Faster
@Raz: I made one a long time ago. I wish I could find it. :/
This site might have some: http://gloriosa.midgar-rock.org/terms.php
This site might have some: http://gloriosa.midgar-rock.org/terms.php
LunarSkye
Pro Adventurer
- AKA
- CL, Prompto
Celes Chere
Banned
- AKA
- Noctis
OKAY I DON'T REALLY BELONG HERE BUT THIS IS A REALLY GOOD TRIBUTE TO CLOUD.
*TEAR*
And if by some odd chance this was already posted, my bad... xD
*TEAR*
And if by some odd chance this was already posted, my bad... xD
Obsidian Fire
Ahk Morn!
- AKA
- The Engineer
I've found some good Cloud fanfiction recently. I'll post up some more as soon as I find them again...
The following oneshot is one of the most accurate takes on what Cloud is thinking post-Meteor Fall and pre-AC, pretty much Cloud's side of COT, that I've found. Here's the fanfiction.net link and the actual oneshot below.
The following oneshot is one of the most accurate takes on what Cloud is thinking post-Meteor Fall and pre-AC, pretty much Cloud's side of COT, that I've found. Here's the fanfiction.net link and the actual oneshot below.
by TamLin
He was happy.
It scared the hell out of him.
don't trust it…
He didn't get 'happy' often in his life. Bursts, rays, brilliant engulfing beams
of it – yes. Continual, steady, reliable happiness… no.
hell no…
But here it was, threatening him with its – with its –
Its mundanity.
It had started when he reached the beginning of Edge.
no… no, before that…
It had started when he finally turned Fenrir toward Edge.
no… before that…
It had started that morning when he'd woken up before the sun, still in the dark, and smelled coffee and known she… Tifa… she was already awake and waiting in the kitchen for him. He had known that he would check on the sleeping children and then go down to her and sit and listen to her talk and tease and send him out the door with food he always forgot to eat.
Happy. He'd woken up happy.
damn it all…
The warm, quiet pleasure had faded on the way out the door but not by much. Fenrir was waiting for him and he was still warm with coffee and her goodbye hug. It had stayed with him like a worm in his stomach all day as his customers had been grateful -
too grateful. I'm not a hero anymore. Gave that up. never really was…
For their packages and letters. Then the warmth had woken and grown when he'd turned Fenrir home…
home. She's always meant home…
Home to the children and her… Tifa…. The entire drive back it had wiggled in his stomach and when he'd reached Edge it had worked its way upward until it was threatening his heart as he'd seen –
Heaven
Seventh Heaven come into view. He had walked in the door and heard the children…
up too late… past their bedtime… so glad…
Heard the children call his name and both of them – both of them – had come rushing over to latch on to him.
Marlene…she's not scared of me anymore…
Marlene had wrapped around his waist. Denzel, shyer, more reserved, eyes in his heart, heart in his eyes, had managed to restrain himself and only clutch at Cloud's hand with both of his. He'd ruffled their hair, squeezed Marlene's shoulder, lifted Denzel easily off the floor with just one arm while the boy beamed with pleasure and held on like life…
love…
To his grip. The warmth, the worm in his heart, had struggled upward into his throat and threatened to choke him…
The way it does every night…
And then she'd said 'welcome home' as she came out of the kitchen…
beautiful… she gets more beautiful every day… every time I see her…how can she be so beautiful and still smile at me that way…
He'd wanted her wrapped around him too, the way the children were, but he couldn't ask. Could never ask. Couldn't even dare show it for fear…
Break… everything will break… idiot for wanting… stop thinking it…
But she'd known anyway and she'd come over with that smile…
mine… that's my smile… I'm the only one she smiles at that way…
And wrapped her arms around him and it had been…
heaven… his very own Promised Land...
She made everything heaven. Haven. Home. Marlene had giggled and he'd lowered his head, just his head –
idiot
And shut his eyes and exhaled as he felt the soft skin of her shoulder against his chin and she'd laughed so quiet and soft and stroked her fingers through his hair gently. Tender like a mother, familiar and relaxed with the motion like a best friend, sending pleasure down his back and shoulders like a -
like a sweetheart…
The worm in his throat had wrapped around his heart and his stomach as well
how did it grow so much every day…
And it had squeezed. It made him lift his free hand and gently, carefully, wrap his fingers around her delicate ribs. Made him think of how good it would feel if he'd take her in his arms the way he let himself sometimes.
idiot
Made him think of how nice it would be to never have to let go.
She'd saved him, the way she did every night, stepping back with her lips brushing his cheek and his head had turned the way it did every night so his lips were there when her cheek drew back and he could feel her skin brush against them for a brief moment. The worm in charge of his entire chest and throat and stomach and head and the dry tight place behind his eyes had started to pulse like a heart beat the way it always did and he'd let her go and the children had dragged him over to the table to show him what they'd done that day.
even though it's past their bedtime… so glad…
She'd brought him dinner and then watched to make sure he ate, sitting across the table from him and smiling their shared, secret smile over the children and their big – BIG – events of the day.
how did she always know when he'd forgotten to stop for lunch…
It had been warm and perfect and quiet and content. No large explosions of bliss, no thundering drums of joy, no breathless squeeze of heart numbing pleasure – just… quiet, content, stable, peace and happiness to simply exist in the bubble of life and liveliness he found himself in.
Insidious because it promised it would always be just this way for him. That he would always be allowed to come back to it.
Again and again.
Year after year.
On nights like that, he felt the traitorous shaft of hope in his chest when he looked at Denzel. That, maybe, they could win again. That, maybe tomorrow, the cure for the black bruise on the boy's forehead and the hidden ones on his thin, little chest would come. He'd find it, or one of his contacts would, or a total stranger would but - someone would and Denzel would be able to wake up each morning without pain or fear. That, maybe, this time, everything would work out.
hate that…
love that…
idiot…
Life didn't work that way. Not for anyone and particularly not for him. You only got so many lucky breaks and they'd used up all of theirs two years ago.
A moment too late, too soon…
An unobservant guard…
a dropped key…
Cloud Strife didn't trust luck for the same reason he didn't trust happiness. He'd had that. He'd been there. And it had always been taken away.
His childhood hadn't been happy. It hadn't been bad, but it hadn't been happy. He'd learned to recognize and appreciate the rays of joy when they came. The late night sound of the piano next door through his open bedroom window. The smell of his mother's turnovers. The bite of the cold, clean air on the mountain and the same bite in the water of its streams.
He'd gone to Shinra.
The best worse decision I've ever made
And he hadn't been happy there either. He hadn't been unhappy. He'd enjoyed the moments of pleasure. Laughing with his squad mates. A letter from home. The secret satisfaction when the other guys talked about their girls and he'd remembered the one he hoped would one day be his. Zack…
Zack…
His first experience with easy happiness that stayed around and didn't leave. His first best friend. The first time he'd realized he hadn't been happy all the time before and realized how nice it was to be that way now.
idiot
naïve idiot
He'd… failed that. Failed his friend. Been too weak, too slow
too late
Even now he didn't remember it completely and some nights it almost drove him mad, twisting around inside his head. He only had fragmented bits and pieces of that nightmare in his memory even now. Flashes of faces or voices, jarring movement, green haze over his vision making him sick to his stomach. Certain shades of green still made him sick to his stomach…
He'd been too weak though, even with his mako-infused body. Too weak in his mind. He'd been too weak and Zack had died and Cloud had shattered and –
And not even remembered it!
He'd forgotten his best friend and, on a more forgivable level, he'd forgotten what being regularly happy had felt like and so… when he'd found consistent happiness again… he hadn't thought to guard against it. He'd let it in and accepted it.
naïve
He'd been regularly happy with Aeris. So consistently happy that he'd thought it was love. She hadn't asked past who he thought he was, hadn't – until the very end – looked deeper than what he showed her, had laughed and not been demanding and she'd…
She'd reminded him of Zack.
Not in personality but in the simple acceptance and the easy friendship. She'd wanted more than friendship but it had still come with the offer of friendship and there had been no sense of failure that had lurked in him whenever he was with Tifa those first few weeks.
his failure… at the time, he just hadn't remembered that he'd failed her…
He hadn't had to think with Aeris and that had made him happy. He'd been happy.
He'd made promises he should have known, if he'd only remembered, that he'd broken already before and would never be able to keep now…
He'd been happy and then it had been taken away from him again. And this time he hadn't forgotten and he'd felt the ache of…
Of not being happy.
It made him sound like such a self-centered bastard. Who was he to worry about whether he was happy or not? Who was he to miss it when he wasn't happy anymore? After everything everyone else had been through, everything that had been lost – what kind of absolute ass thought him not being happy was important?
it's not…
I still know when I'm happy and when I'm not…
He'd lost being happy again – and so much more.
So much more…
And, again, it had been because he wasn't strong enough. Mentally. He had been too late. Again.
again
again
all over again
still
He'd been too late, too weak, and he'd let someone he cared about die. Again. His sins were his failures… his weaknesses… their deaths. His fault. Every single time… the deaths were his fault. People he'd loved had suffered because they'd counted on him and he'd been too weak and too late to save them.
He loved Tifa and the children.
Gaia… how he loved Tifa and the children…
So much worse and stronger and more painful and wonderful and ruthless than he'd ever loved anyone or anything before. The worm in his chest that grew each day threatened to strangle him sometimes and when he was away from them for more than a day it ate little pieces out of his heart to keep itself alive. His family…
my family…
He'd never been so desperate to protect anything in his life before. It seemed so small and fragile and vulnerable. His family, his family… and an entire world that could destroy it in a thousand different ways. Death lurking like a specter over Denzel's shoulder every day, and he'd already watched one little girl sliced open by a madman for being brave and beautiful and foolish. Marlene was Barret's daughter to the core, but she was Tifa's as well and sometimes even… sometimes…
she gets her steely-eyed glare from me…
shouldn't be proud of that…
Even Tifa –
especially Tifa…
How much of her luck had she already used up in their quest to stop Sephiroth? How many more lucky breaks could one human possibly have left to them before Fate decided enough was enough? They'd, both of them, already used up the last of their luck. There wouldn't be any more breaks coming. He knew it. And it terrified him. Because Tifa was still brave and beautiful and foolish when it came to defending the ones she loved.
and I lo- I lov- damn it, I'll break if I admit it…
or she'll break… I'll break her…
So many horrible things in the world and Cloud knew he hadn't even seen them all. So much that could irreplaceably damage or destroy his family. Sometimes… Sometimes, despite the pain in his heart, he found himself stalling going home. Because... some nights, for no reason at all, he was afraid to go home. Afraid that he'd walk in the door and they'd all be dead.
That he would have, again, been too late –
Shit. He sounded like such a head-case.
Just because some nights, randomly, for again no reason, he'd wake up choking in the dark with his cheeks wet with tears he didn't remember giving away and visions of swords through the stomachs of the children or bullet holes leaking a raining river from Tifa –
He'd wake up and need to – need to – walk that little distance across the hall.
Don't run. It'll wake Tifa up if you run.
Walk across the hall and open the doors with hands that weren't steady just to look at them. Sometimes –
memories of blood trails on the floor… of the way burning bodies smelled as a village went up in flames…
screams heard through the glass of a test tube…
Sometimes he had to physically walk into the rooms. Touch them. Watch them breath. He'd woken Tifa up several nights ago, standing by the window in the dark of a moonless night just watching her breath. She'd almost kicked his legs out from under him before she'd realized who he was. Then she'd thrown a pillow at him and told him to come to bed.
how did she always know…
He'd slept in her arms that night, wrapped in the soft warmth of her bed and her body, and even though it had been chaste it had been the most intimate moment of his entire life so far.
want to do that every night.
don't want the clothes in the way next time…
Idiot.
There's not supposed to be a next time.
...
…want a next time…
The more he loved his family, the deeper in love with them he fell…
The more frightened he became.
Because he'd been happy this way before and it had destroyed him when he'd had it taken away from him. And he hadn't been nearly as happy, as consistently, consumingly happy as he was now. Twice before –
No… more than twice…
Many times more than twice…
Many times before he'd failed. Failed when it really mattered, when he, if he was a hero, should have been unable to fail – he'd failed and it had utterly ruined the lives of the people he'd been meant to protect. It had utterly shattered him. When it counted most – when it mattered most to him… him. Not the universe or the planet or all things good and kind but him personally, Cloud Strife, him… When it mattered most to him, he always failed. It was his one consistent. He was always too late and he was always too weak. Always.
And so his mother died.
And Zack died.
And Aeris died.
And… who died next…?
Who was left for him to fail but this? His family? His precious, impossible, misfit, patchwork, loved and adored, impossibly necessary family?
What was left to be taken from him but them?
It terrified him. Terrified him as if he was a small child. Terrified him deep in his bones, right at the core of his heart. He'd been happy before. He'd loved and been loved before. And he'd had it taken away.
Another consistent in his life.
His body had been turned into a living weapon. Twisted and warped and put back together. Filled so full of chemicals and magic and mako that he shouldn't even have a soul inside it anymore. It should be strong enough, after all that had been paid for it, to protect the ones that mattered most to him.
It never had been.
He was always too late.
He was always too weak.
What he loved was always taken away from him and he was too weak and too slow to stop it.
It had taken the thick black pus leaking from what he'd thought was only a bruise to freeze him on his way to the shower the next morning.
Because, despite everything he'd been through –
It had never once occurred to Cloud Strife that, this time, he would be the one taken away from them.
He was happy.
It scared the hell out of him.
don't trust it…
He didn't get 'happy' often in his life. Bursts, rays, brilliant engulfing beams
of it – yes. Continual, steady, reliable happiness… no.
hell no…
But here it was, threatening him with its – with its –
Its mundanity.
It had started when he reached the beginning of Edge.
no… no, before that…
It had started when he finally turned Fenrir toward Edge.
no… before that…
It had started that morning when he'd woken up before the sun, still in the dark, and smelled coffee and known she… Tifa… she was already awake and waiting in the kitchen for him. He had known that he would check on the sleeping children and then go down to her and sit and listen to her talk and tease and send him out the door with food he always forgot to eat.
Happy. He'd woken up happy.
damn it all…
The warm, quiet pleasure had faded on the way out the door but not by much. Fenrir was waiting for him and he was still warm with coffee and her goodbye hug. It had stayed with him like a worm in his stomach all day as his customers had been grateful -
too grateful. I'm not a hero anymore. Gave that up. never really was…
For their packages and letters. Then the warmth had woken and grown when he'd turned Fenrir home…
home. She's always meant home…
Home to the children and her… Tifa…. The entire drive back it had wiggled in his stomach and when he'd reached Edge it had worked its way upward until it was threatening his heart as he'd seen –
Heaven
Seventh Heaven come into view. He had walked in the door and heard the children…
up too late… past their bedtime… so glad…
Heard the children call his name and both of them – both of them – had come rushing over to latch on to him.
Marlene…she's not scared of me anymore…
Marlene had wrapped around his waist. Denzel, shyer, more reserved, eyes in his heart, heart in his eyes, had managed to restrain himself and only clutch at Cloud's hand with both of his. He'd ruffled their hair, squeezed Marlene's shoulder, lifted Denzel easily off the floor with just one arm while the boy beamed with pleasure and held on like life…
love…
To his grip. The warmth, the worm in his heart, had struggled upward into his throat and threatened to choke him…
The way it does every night…
And then she'd said 'welcome home' as she came out of the kitchen…
beautiful… she gets more beautiful every day… every time I see her…how can she be so beautiful and still smile at me that way…
He'd wanted her wrapped around him too, the way the children were, but he couldn't ask. Could never ask. Couldn't even dare show it for fear…
Break… everything will break… idiot for wanting… stop thinking it…
But she'd known anyway and she'd come over with that smile…
mine… that's my smile… I'm the only one she smiles at that way…
And wrapped her arms around him and it had been…
heaven… his very own Promised Land...
She made everything heaven. Haven. Home. Marlene had giggled and he'd lowered his head, just his head –
idiot
And shut his eyes and exhaled as he felt the soft skin of her shoulder against his chin and she'd laughed so quiet and soft and stroked her fingers through his hair gently. Tender like a mother, familiar and relaxed with the motion like a best friend, sending pleasure down his back and shoulders like a -
like a sweetheart…
The worm in his throat had wrapped around his heart and his stomach as well
how did it grow so much every day…
And it had squeezed. It made him lift his free hand and gently, carefully, wrap his fingers around her delicate ribs. Made him think of how good it would feel if he'd take her in his arms the way he let himself sometimes.
idiot
Made him think of how nice it would be to never have to let go.
She'd saved him, the way she did every night, stepping back with her lips brushing his cheek and his head had turned the way it did every night so his lips were there when her cheek drew back and he could feel her skin brush against them for a brief moment. The worm in charge of his entire chest and throat and stomach and head and the dry tight place behind his eyes had started to pulse like a heart beat the way it always did and he'd let her go and the children had dragged him over to the table to show him what they'd done that day.
even though it's past their bedtime… so glad…
She'd brought him dinner and then watched to make sure he ate, sitting across the table from him and smiling their shared, secret smile over the children and their big – BIG – events of the day.
how did she always know when he'd forgotten to stop for lunch…
It had been warm and perfect and quiet and content. No large explosions of bliss, no thundering drums of joy, no breathless squeeze of heart numbing pleasure – just… quiet, content, stable, peace and happiness to simply exist in the bubble of life and liveliness he found himself in.
Insidious because it promised it would always be just this way for him. That he would always be allowed to come back to it.
Again and again.
Year after year.
On nights like that, he felt the traitorous shaft of hope in his chest when he looked at Denzel. That, maybe, they could win again. That, maybe tomorrow, the cure for the black bruise on the boy's forehead and the hidden ones on his thin, little chest would come. He'd find it, or one of his contacts would, or a total stranger would but - someone would and Denzel would be able to wake up each morning without pain or fear. That, maybe, this time, everything would work out.
hate that…
love that…
idiot…
Life didn't work that way. Not for anyone and particularly not for him. You only got so many lucky breaks and they'd used up all of theirs two years ago.
A moment too late, too soon…
An unobservant guard…
a dropped key…
Cloud Strife didn't trust luck for the same reason he didn't trust happiness. He'd had that. He'd been there. And it had always been taken away.
His childhood hadn't been happy. It hadn't been bad, but it hadn't been happy. He'd learned to recognize and appreciate the rays of joy when they came. The late night sound of the piano next door through his open bedroom window. The smell of his mother's turnovers. The bite of the cold, clean air on the mountain and the same bite in the water of its streams.
He'd gone to Shinra.
The best worse decision I've ever made
And he hadn't been happy there either. He hadn't been unhappy. He'd enjoyed the moments of pleasure. Laughing with his squad mates. A letter from home. The secret satisfaction when the other guys talked about their girls and he'd remembered the one he hoped would one day be his. Zack…
Zack…
His first experience with easy happiness that stayed around and didn't leave. His first best friend. The first time he'd realized he hadn't been happy all the time before and realized how nice it was to be that way now.
idiot
naïve idiot
He'd… failed that. Failed his friend. Been too weak, too slow
too late
Even now he didn't remember it completely and some nights it almost drove him mad, twisting around inside his head. He only had fragmented bits and pieces of that nightmare in his memory even now. Flashes of faces or voices, jarring movement, green haze over his vision making him sick to his stomach. Certain shades of green still made him sick to his stomach…
He'd been too weak though, even with his mako-infused body. Too weak in his mind. He'd been too weak and Zack had died and Cloud had shattered and –
And not even remembered it!
He'd forgotten his best friend and, on a more forgivable level, he'd forgotten what being regularly happy had felt like and so… when he'd found consistent happiness again… he hadn't thought to guard against it. He'd let it in and accepted it.
naïve
He'd been regularly happy with Aeris. So consistently happy that he'd thought it was love. She hadn't asked past who he thought he was, hadn't – until the very end – looked deeper than what he showed her, had laughed and not been demanding and she'd…
She'd reminded him of Zack.
Not in personality but in the simple acceptance and the easy friendship. She'd wanted more than friendship but it had still come with the offer of friendship and there had been no sense of failure that had lurked in him whenever he was with Tifa those first few weeks.
his failure… at the time, he just hadn't remembered that he'd failed her…
He hadn't had to think with Aeris and that had made him happy. He'd been happy.
He'd made promises he should have known, if he'd only remembered, that he'd broken already before and would never be able to keep now…
He'd been happy and then it had been taken away from him again. And this time he hadn't forgotten and he'd felt the ache of…
Of not being happy.
It made him sound like such a self-centered bastard. Who was he to worry about whether he was happy or not? Who was he to miss it when he wasn't happy anymore? After everything everyone else had been through, everything that had been lost – what kind of absolute ass thought him not being happy was important?
it's not…
I still know when I'm happy and when I'm not…
He'd lost being happy again – and so much more.
So much more…
And, again, it had been because he wasn't strong enough. Mentally. He had been too late. Again.
again
again
all over again
still
He'd been too late, too weak, and he'd let someone he cared about die. Again. His sins were his failures… his weaknesses… their deaths. His fault. Every single time… the deaths were his fault. People he'd loved had suffered because they'd counted on him and he'd been too weak and too late to save them.
He loved Tifa and the children.
Gaia… how he loved Tifa and the children…
So much worse and stronger and more painful and wonderful and ruthless than he'd ever loved anyone or anything before. The worm in his chest that grew each day threatened to strangle him sometimes and when he was away from them for more than a day it ate little pieces out of his heart to keep itself alive. His family…
my family…
He'd never been so desperate to protect anything in his life before. It seemed so small and fragile and vulnerable. His family, his family… and an entire world that could destroy it in a thousand different ways. Death lurking like a specter over Denzel's shoulder every day, and he'd already watched one little girl sliced open by a madman for being brave and beautiful and foolish. Marlene was Barret's daughter to the core, but she was Tifa's as well and sometimes even… sometimes…
she gets her steely-eyed glare from me…
shouldn't be proud of that…
Even Tifa –
especially Tifa…
How much of her luck had she already used up in their quest to stop Sephiroth? How many more lucky breaks could one human possibly have left to them before Fate decided enough was enough? They'd, both of them, already used up the last of their luck. There wouldn't be any more breaks coming. He knew it. And it terrified him. Because Tifa was still brave and beautiful and foolish when it came to defending the ones she loved.
and I lo- I lov- damn it, I'll break if I admit it…
or she'll break… I'll break her…
So many horrible things in the world and Cloud knew he hadn't even seen them all. So much that could irreplaceably damage or destroy his family. Sometimes… Sometimes, despite the pain in his heart, he found himself stalling going home. Because... some nights, for no reason at all, he was afraid to go home. Afraid that he'd walk in the door and they'd all be dead.
That he would have, again, been too late –
Shit. He sounded like such a head-case.
Just because some nights, randomly, for again no reason, he'd wake up choking in the dark with his cheeks wet with tears he didn't remember giving away and visions of swords through the stomachs of the children or bullet holes leaking a raining river from Tifa –
He'd wake up and need to – need to – walk that little distance across the hall.
Don't run. It'll wake Tifa up if you run.
Walk across the hall and open the doors with hands that weren't steady just to look at them. Sometimes –
memories of blood trails on the floor… of the way burning bodies smelled as a village went up in flames…
screams heard through the glass of a test tube…
Sometimes he had to physically walk into the rooms. Touch them. Watch them breath. He'd woken Tifa up several nights ago, standing by the window in the dark of a moonless night just watching her breath. She'd almost kicked his legs out from under him before she'd realized who he was. Then she'd thrown a pillow at him and told him to come to bed.
how did she always know…
He'd slept in her arms that night, wrapped in the soft warmth of her bed and her body, and even though it had been chaste it had been the most intimate moment of his entire life so far.
want to do that every night.
don't want the clothes in the way next time…
Idiot.
There's not supposed to be a next time.
...
…want a next time…
The more he loved his family, the deeper in love with them he fell…
The more frightened he became.
Because he'd been happy this way before and it had destroyed him when he'd had it taken away from him. And he hadn't been nearly as happy, as consistently, consumingly happy as he was now. Twice before –
No… more than twice…
Many times more than twice…
Many times before he'd failed. Failed when it really mattered, when he, if he was a hero, should have been unable to fail – he'd failed and it had utterly ruined the lives of the people he'd been meant to protect. It had utterly shattered him. When it counted most – when it mattered most to him… him. Not the universe or the planet or all things good and kind but him personally, Cloud Strife, him… When it mattered most to him, he always failed. It was his one consistent. He was always too late and he was always too weak. Always.
And so his mother died.
And Zack died.
And Aeris died.
And… who died next…?
Who was left for him to fail but this? His family? His precious, impossible, misfit, patchwork, loved and adored, impossibly necessary family?
What was left to be taken from him but them?
It terrified him. Terrified him as if he was a small child. Terrified him deep in his bones, right at the core of his heart. He'd been happy before. He'd loved and been loved before. And he'd had it taken away.
Another consistent in his life.
His body had been turned into a living weapon. Twisted and warped and put back together. Filled so full of chemicals and magic and mako that he shouldn't even have a soul inside it anymore. It should be strong enough, after all that had been paid for it, to protect the ones that mattered most to him.
It never had been.
He was always too late.
He was always too weak.
What he loved was always taken away from him and he was too weak and too slow to stop it.
It had taken the thick black pus leaking from what he'd thought was only a bruise to freeze him on his way to the shower the next morning.
Because, despite everything he'd been through –
It had never once occurred to Cloud Strife that, this time, he would be the one taken away from them.
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Elisa Maza
Whomst
Ahhh, yes, the "For their own good" series. Kitsune13 is one of the best FFVII fanfic writers I've seen. So enjoyably in character... *.*
And "Taken" just hits the spot.
Another oneshot that shows Cloud's mindset before the movie is A Man Called Tuesday. One of my favourites as well and it even uses quotes from CoT.
WAT.
It's CloTi BY FAR. Where did you get that idea???????????
And "Taken" just hits the spot.
Many times before he'd failed. Failed when it really mattered, when he, if he was a hero, should have been unable to fail – he'd failed and it had utterly ruined the lives of the people he'd been meant to protect. It had utterly shattered him. When it counted most – when it mattered most to him… him. Not the universe or the planet or all things good and kind but him personally, Cloud Strife, him… When it mattered most to him, he always failed. It was his one consistent. He was always too late and he was always too weak. Always.
And so his mother died.
And Zack died.
And Aeris died.
And… who died next…?
Who was left for him to fail but this? His family? His precious, impossible, misfit, patchwork, loved and adored, impossibly necessary family?
What was left to be taken from him but them?
It terrified him. Terrified him as if he was a small child. Terrified him deep in his bones, right at the core of his heart. He'd been happy before. He'd loved and been loved before. And he'd had it taken away.
Another consistent in his life.
And so his mother died.
And Zack died.
And Aeris died.
And… who died next…?
Who was left for him to fail but this? His family? His precious, impossible, misfit, patchwork, loved and adored, impossibly necessary family?
What was left to be taken from him but them?
It terrified him. Terrified him as if he was a small child. Terrified him deep in his bones, right at the core of his heart. He'd been happy before. He'd loved and been loved before. And he'd had it taken away.
Another consistent in his life.
Another oneshot that shows Cloud's mindset before the movie is A Man Called Tuesday. One of my favourites as well and it even uses quotes from CoT.
I started reading that "Taken Away" story, thought it was good, then noticed it was a Clack fanfic. Not my cup of tea.
*proceeds drinking a different cup of tea*
WAT.
It's CloTi BY FAR. Where did you get that idea???????????
Shademp
420
"The secret satisfaction when the other guys talked about their girls and he'd remembered the one he hoped would one day be his. Zack…
Zack…"
...Or am I just reading this wrong? I didn't really mean "Clack" in the strong sense, but the above sentence seems to imply that Cloud is bi.
Zack…"
...Or am I just reading this wrong? I didn't really mean "Clack" in the strong sense, but the above sentence seems to imply that Cloud is bi.
Elisa Maza
Whomst
"[...]but the above sentence seems to imply that Cloud is bi."
*HEADDESK*
No one can talk about friendship between two young men these days without people turning it into something sexual. And I'm not talking about the harmless fanon yaoi shipping.
Yes. You ARE reading this wrong. Read further.
The author just points out and drives home how damaging Zack's death was to Cloud. In other words, the canon. It also includes Aerith and his mom in this category. Read the extract I posted.
*HEADDESK*
No one can talk about friendship between two young men these days without people turning it into something sexual. And I'm not talking about the harmless fanon yaoi shipping.
Yes. You ARE reading this wrong. Read further.
The author just points out and drives home how damaging Zack's death was to Cloud. In other words, the canon. It also includes Aerith and his mom in this category. Read the extract I posted.
Elisa Maza
Whomst
Double post, but eh.
I was watching a documentary about J.K. Rowling the other day and a quote of hers about the ending of Harry Potter stroke me straight to the mind about Cloud's mentality after the Jenova wars. Plenty a times, people complain about Cloud not being able to go on with his life and family, that he is handicapped too easily by the past... and what the writer said, I think explains everything about this inability in the beginning of his and of his mental strength to be able to do so at the end of Advent Children Complete.
Emphasis mine. The bold parts are the points that I think they hit home about Cloud's journey in ACC. He was able to find the strength and rebuild, (as a father, no less!) give values to the newest generation, as we saw him doing after the credits in the movie with Denzel.
I was watching a documentary about J.K. Rowling the other day and a quote of hers about the ending of Harry Potter stroke me straight to the mind about Cloud's mentality after the Jenova wars. Plenty a times, people complain about Cloud not being able to go on with his life and family, that he is handicapped too easily by the past... and what the writer said, I think explains everything about this inability in the beginning of his and of his mental strength to be able to do so at the end of Advent Children Complete.
"In many ways it would have been a neater ending to kill him. For sure, I knew that all along; felt that the books' overriding message was that love is the most powerful force in this world. My model with Harry really was war veterans, who have seen horrors and are asked to go home and rebuild, and go back to their ordinary life and care for a family, be a father - particularly be a father - [it is] a difficult job, in troubled times. I felt it would be a betrayal of his character if I did anything other than show him doing that. And I think it's an absolutely heroic thing to do, to go home after that, not to become a mercenary, not to live forever frozen in a time of excitement and danger, but to be mentally strong enough, to an extent physically strong enough, to return from war and to raise a new generation with values that you hope will not lead to another war. That's massive.
Of course you can say, yes, to an extent, as ever in life, that's the eternal paradox. What is most worthwhile may well be seen as slightly dull, but God knows without those people who were prepared to come home and raise the family and rebuild, help rebuild... rebuilding is much more difficult than destroying. So, I felt it was almost a cop-out, morally, to kill him. I wanted to show a man who, yeah, he went back and got his hands dirty and tried to rebuild. I liked that. And again, it made a lot of people livid, but God knows by that time I was used to that by then!"
- JK Rowling
Of course you can say, yes, to an extent, as ever in life, that's the eternal paradox. What is most worthwhile may well be seen as slightly dull, but God knows without those people who were prepared to come home and raise the family and rebuild, help rebuild... rebuilding is much more difficult than destroying. So, I felt it was almost a cop-out, morally, to kill him. I wanted to show a man who, yeah, he went back and got his hands dirty and tried to rebuild. I liked that. And again, it made a lot of people livid, but God knows by that time I was used to that by then!"
- JK Rowling
Emphasis mine. The bold parts are the points that I think they hit home about Cloud's journey in ACC. He was able to find the strength and rebuild, (as a father, no less!) give values to the newest generation, as we saw him doing after the credits in the movie with Denzel.
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Elisa Maza
Whomst
Tennyo
Higher Further Faster
Wow, very large image. But that's pretty awesome looking. Thanks for the find. 
I actually quite agree with this. It goes along more with how Cloud kind of goes down a slope of sorts in the novellas. He starts out strong and gung-ho, ready to build his life, but as life settles in he finds out that it's really not so easy.
Once he no longer has something to occupy his time 24/7, he starts thinking about his failures and that's where he starts to falter.
I actually quite agree with this. It goes along more with how Cloud kind of goes down a slope of sorts in the novellas. He starts out strong and gung-ho, ready to build his life, but as life settles in he finds out that it's really not so easy.
Once he no longer has something to occupy his time 24/7, he starts thinking about his failures and that's where he starts to falter.
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Elisa Maza
Whomst
The face is pretty, but the body... how the hell could he have passed as a woman with his muscles??
Kai Schulen
... ... ...▼
- AKA
- Trainer Red
Tennyo
Higher Further Faster
I don't get it. :/
Shademp
420
Cloud saw Halley's comet and decided it wasn't epic enough. So he knocked it away and replaced the comet with his own awesomeness.
...When the three wise men followed the star to Jesus' birthplace, they were in fact not following a star. They were following Cloud Strife, soaring across the sky.
...When the three wise men followed the star to Jesus' birthplace, they were in fact not following a star. They were following Cloud Strife, soaring across the sky.
Kai Schulen
... ... ...▼
- AKA
- Trainer Red
And it wasn't the birth of Jesus they were witnessing, for it was actually the moment when Cloud was born!Cloud saw Halley's comet and decided it wasn't epic enough. So he knocked it away and replaced the comet with his own awesomeness.
...When the three wise men followed the star to Jesus' birthplace, they were in fact not following a star. They were following Cloud Strife, soaring across the sky.
OMG PIME TARADOX
Obsidian Fire
Ahk Morn!
- AKA
- The Engineer
^^Yep. Specifically, it's a picture of the sun. It's blocked out by the disk in the middle so that the stars behind it can be seen.
