tbh I think the Awards makes everybody feel awkward at times. ("Why didn't you vote for me?!") I wouldn't mind if we dropped them; the problem is they bring activity to the board. Also, shameless flirting is fun
What we could do (and should do) imo is to be more democratic about which awards we want to vote for, at least have a discussion in the mod section for it. I think the "you tried" and "least likely to get an award" are good awards, but the thing is, even the "smex" categories (porn stars, pistoning penors), as well as "member you'd most like to meet", "best avatar", "mos fervent TLSer", "best beard" and "best pantomime villain" (I'm sad the "Being Splintered Award" didn't make it, and "nicest member" should have made the cut) are all those kind of categories that "makes it possible to win an award". What you did Ari, was you focused on one award that didn't even make the list, and when it didn't, you sort of dropped out.
It's not about people clinging together to vote for each other - it's about people suggesting themselves which categories they would like to be nommed for (and protesting when they aren't to get someone to nom them), then rallying for the ones they
did get nommed in. I know it sounds like a clusterfuck of social rules, which it is, no doubt - but in the end it's all about staying active and being ranty/ friendly when the nominations start happening. A lot of people didn't get awards this year that should have had one (Dark and Divine, for instance; their work on the front page sailed completely unnoticed by) so yes, it's a publicity/ popularity contest - for both good and bad. Take it for what it is and treat it as such - not getting awards does not mean you're unwelcome, and getting them does not mean you're to be put on a pedestal of sorts, it just means people have noticed you (for being active) and remember you when they see the poll.
tl;dr I think I made a similar comment when you said a similar thing last year: You're not out of place, you belong here, stay put! I like your XIII rant (even for being minorly obsessed with the fal'Cie
) and you should start being active in the General Discussion section again - you've been less active there this year haven't you, which probably also affected the awards this year. How's your new job going? Has your cat started behaving recently? I have no idea what's been up with you. If you look at the overall results of the award, it's the people who spill their guts the most in this place that is on top of this list. Not that you need to start sharing every detail about your personal life - it's just a reminder that the awards result is not a sign that people don't like you or feel you should just get out. Nobody would question why you're still here, why would you even say that - you're beating yourself up where nobody here is.