Addressing the core issues
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Geostigma
Pro Adventurer
- AKA
- gabe
Arianna
Holy, Personified
- AKA
- Katie; Seta.
Since I was asked to move this; also it was edited, even though the edit ignores things said by the creator of the original thread:
That's the thing. I disagree. People don't have to be idiots for no reason. I don't know the story behind this 'cool story bro', but... Really? You deserved it? Unless you really did something wrong, hurting someone, or being rude to someone who did nothing to you (and this is all I can think of right now) - you didn't. This is my opinion, of course.
Personally, I, for one, was raised that you don't go into a conversation with a large group of people blaring. In other words, you don't go in thinking swear words are going to be accepted and tolerated by everyone. And if you do this, and they don't accept it or tolerate it, there will be consequences! You've got to know your audience, and even then - bad moods, misunderstandings - they happen! I just don't accept being called a 'bitch' even in jest if I didn't do anything.
Yes, I am very excitable, and yes, I take things personally. I'll admit this. But, I am put off by such attitude and language. I am timid to confrontation, sadly - so it's hard for me to speak up all the time. In this, I am kind of scared of Dacon's approach when he feels such things are appropriate. I also don't know a lot of the time when he is really kidding or being serious.
Plus, I feel like a dunce everytime I have to say and/or ask, 'I don't know what you mean. Could you explain?' It's a fair thing to say at times, but... ?!?!
I think this comes down to things like polite conversation, responsibility and consequences are going out the freakin' door! Seriously, I pose this question again: If I came out making a post saying, "Hey niggers!" or "Hey yo bitches and hos!", what would you guys think? First, you have to know me (understandably), but second of all - that's just not appropriate. I would deserve to be modded because I offended someone and deserve to be told 'hey, knock it off, be civil!' I know if I did that in public in person, I'd at least get a lot of strange stares and glares!
Ten years separate most of us, at least, and it's probably that I was raised that one prefers conversation over confrontation. Words like 'bitch', 'slut', let alone 'cracker' or 'nigger' - inappropriate, and confrontational.
Look, I don't want to disrupt the whole of this forum, and I don't want people to feel they have to bow down to my 'old fashioned manners'. I don't want to leave, but I just feel there's got to be a median that all agree one. Personally, if Dacon or anyone else would come to an agreement with me and others on what we can live with, without stifling each other with confusing and confrontational remarks, even in gest... I'll go for that. I would work on talking with anyone on that.
PS: I could ignore it, true - but sometimes just seeing it irritates me. *throws up arms in utter defeat* Plus, I was about to be modded for saying 'fuck you', yet others here get away with swearing and racial comments in jest?! That's not right.
That's the thing. I disagree. People don't have to be idiots for no reason. I don't know the story behind this 'cool story bro', but... Really? You deserved it? Unless you really did something wrong, hurting someone, or being rude to someone who did nothing to you (and this is all I can think of right now) - you didn't. This is my opinion, of course.
Personally, I, for one, was raised that you don't go into a conversation with a large group of people blaring. In other words, you don't go in thinking swear words are going to be accepted and tolerated by everyone. And if you do this, and they don't accept it or tolerate it, there will be consequences! You've got to know your audience, and even then - bad moods, misunderstandings - they happen! I just don't accept being called a 'bitch' even in jest if I didn't do anything.
Yes, I am very excitable, and yes, I take things personally. I'll admit this. But, I am put off by such attitude and language. I am timid to confrontation, sadly - so it's hard for me to speak up all the time. In this, I am kind of scared of Dacon's approach when he feels such things are appropriate. I also don't know a lot of the time when he is really kidding or being serious.
Plus, I feel like a dunce everytime I have to say and/or ask, 'I don't know what you mean. Could you explain?' It's a fair thing to say at times, but... ?!?!
I think this comes down to things like polite conversation, responsibility and consequences are going out the freakin' door! Seriously, I pose this question again: If I came out making a post saying, "Hey niggers!" or "Hey yo bitches and hos!", what would you guys think? First, you have to know me (understandably), but second of all - that's just not appropriate. I would deserve to be modded because I offended someone and deserve to be told 'hey, knock it off, be civil!' I know if I did that in public in person, I'd at least get a lot of strange stares and glares!
Ten years separate most of us, at least, and it's probably that I was raised that one prefers conversation over confrontation. Words like 'bitch', 'slut', let alone 'cracker' or 'nigger' - inappropriate, and confrontational.
Look, I don't want to disrupt the whole of this forum, and I don't want people to feel they have to bow down to my 'old fashioned manners'. I don't want to leave, but I just feel there's got to be a median that all agree one. Personally, if Dacon or anyone else would come to an agreement with me and others on what we can live with, without stifling each other with confusing and confrontational remarks, even in gest... I'll go for that. I would work on talking with anyone on that.
PS: I could ignore it, true - but sometimes just seeing it irritates me. *throws up arms in utter defeat* Plus, I was about to be modded for saying 'fuck you', yet others here get away with swearing and racial comments in jest?! That's not right.
Ryushikaze
Deus Admiral Parsimonious, PHD, DDS, MD, JD, OBE
- AKA
- Tim, Ryu
Just a reminder to everyone to please be more constructive. There is no need to take snipes at people in this thread, and this a more serious discussion thread. As a rule, we have enforced the rules more strictly in these than the rest of the forum. You don't have to like each other, but keep it civil, and that means no passive aggression, snide remarks, or macro posts. Moderators will be watching this thread, and will punish overly spammy or nonconstructive posts, and we may delete certain offending posts as well.
Makoeyes987
Listen closely, there is meaning in my words.
- AKA
- Smooth Criminal
Okay, why are you reposting this several days later when we've essentially moved past this? Have you not read the last few pages where all this was addressed and what we're doing? Repeating and slogging this up all over again, serves what purpose?
Dac's already gone, so why are you reposting what you put in his leaving thread inappropriately? Please move on, and read the thread before you post so its actually relevant. We're trying to move on now. Thank you.
Dana Scully
Special Agent
- AKA
- YACCBS, Legato Bluesummers, Daenaerys Targaryen, Revy, Kate Beckett, Samantha Carter, Matsumoto Rangiku
I've caught up on most of the dramas now so I'll just throw out my thoughts on various subjects (some of which are things from other threads I think, it's all kind of one big blur for me). This is probably going to end up being massively tldr so I apologize in advance for the wall of text.
- Agreed that site contributors/staff or whatever that usergroup is should not be able to see the modding section.
- Agreed that there is no real reason reports can't be handled within 24 hours and the first step should always be to notify the reporter that their report has been received and is being looked at. I am also perfectly okay with some sort of defined point system and more banning for repeat offenders instead of constant infractions. (Though I also feel there should always be an expiry date on all punishments, including tempbans, after which they should no longer be considered during current punishments. A statue of limitations or whatever the term is.)
- I think it was Kristen that mentioned this, but staff professionalism. This needs to a be a thing, at all times. I don't care how fucking upset you get, staff needs to stay calm and carry on and be the heroes Gotham deserves. This doesn't mean you can't defend yourself if people take shots at you, but staff should always be taking the high road. I also want to be clear that I don't think that means you can't joke around or anything but whenever drama starts smoldering it is crucial that staff stays objective and calm and not get dragged into their own petty arguments.
- This bullshit about there being cliques is retarded. I'm with Yop on this, there are always going to be groups of friends. We do not need to become one giant friendship circle to function as a community and I wish people would stop focusing on this clique nonsense every time drama comes up.
- All the white knighting needs to stop. I almost feel there needs to be a rule against this because it never accomplishes anything when people butt-in on arguments. Undoubtedly there will always be some third-party commentary on things but ideally people really need to step back and let people fight their own fucking fights instead of leaping in brandishing verbal weaponry. As far as I'm concerned if person A says something person B feels it is insulting to their friend person B needs to just report it and let staff deal with it. Or, if the person being insulted is uncomfortable posting in their own defense and wants to appoint ONE person to speak for them then whatever, fine. I'm just sick of people jumping in and perpetuating dramas because they can't keep their fucking mouths shut and let the original parties/staff sort it out themselves.
- While I realize there will always be staff favouritism among members in terms of who they feel most comfortable talking to, it doesn't help matters when members refuse to discuss their trust issues with the staff in question. If people are only discussing their issues with select staff through non-forum channels it makes it hard for the rest of us to do our jobs properly because we don't have the full picture. I'm not sure if there's a real solution to this but I would like members to be encouraged to use the Private Feedback or Report system so we can all try and work together rather than bring complaints to individual mods.
- I'm going to make an effort to be in the IRC more, I kinda stopped going in there the last few months. If there are currently any mods who intend to be on IRC and do not as yet have mod powers let me know and I will get that set up for you ASAP. Also, blaming the IRC for things is stupid. It is no different than people discussing drama over msn or skype. It's moderated, and people should have no qualms bringing down the iron /kick when it's necessary.
so
yeah
in conclusion this was fucking stupid and I can't believe we lost so many people over this jesus fucking CHRIST
- Agreed that site contributors/staff or whatever that usergroup is should not be able to see the modding section.
- Agreed that there is no real reason reports can't be handled within 24 hours and the first step should always be to notify the reporter that their report has been received and is being looked at. I am also perfectly okay with some sort of defined point system and more banning for repeat offenders instead of constant infractions. (Though I also feel there should always be an expiry date on all punishments, including tempbans, after which they should no longer be considered during current punishments. A statue of limitations or whatever the term is.)
- I think it was Kristen that mentioned this, but staff professionalism. This needs to a be a thing, at all times. I don't care how fucking upset you get, staff needs to stay calm and carry on and be the heroes Gotham deserves. This doesn't mean you can't defend yourself if people take shots at you, but staff should always be taking the high road. I also want to be clear that I don't think that means you can't joke around or anything but whenever drama starts smoldering it is crucial that staff stays objective and calm and not get dragged into their own petty arguments.
- This bullshit about there being cliques is retarded. I'm with Yop on this, there are always going to be groups of friends. We do not need to become one giant friendship circle to function as a community and I wish people would stop focusing on this clique nonsense every time drama comes up.
- All the white knighting needs to stop. I almost feel there needs to be a rule against this because it never accomplishes anything when people butt-in on arguments. Undoubtedly there will always be some third-party commentary on things but ideally people really need to step back and let people fight their own fucking fights instead of leaping in brandishing verbal weaponry. As far as I'm concerned if person A says something person B feels it is insulting to their friend person B needs to just report it and let staff deal with it. Or, if the person being insulted is uncomfortable posting in their own defense and wants to appoint ONE person to speak for them then whatever, fine. I'm just sick of people jumping in and perpetuating dramas because they can't keep their fucking mouths shut and let the original parties/staff sort it out themselves.
- While I realize there will always be staff favouritism among members in terms of who they feel most comfortable talking to, it doesn't help matters when members refuse to discuss their trust issues with the staff in question. If people are only discussing their issues with select staff through non-forum channels it makes it hard for the rest of us to do our jobs properly because we don't have the full picture. I'm not sure if there's a real solution to this but I would like members to be encouraged to use the Private Feedback or Report system so we can all try and work together rather than bring complaints to individual mods.
- I'm going to make an effort to be in the IRC more, I kinda stopped going in there the last few months. If there are currently any mods who intend to be on IRC and do not as yet have mod powers let me know and I will get that set up for you ASAP. Also, blaming the IRC for things is stupid. It is no different than people discussing drama over msn or skype. It's moderated, and people should have no qualms bringing down the iron /kick when it's necessary.
so
yeah
in conclusion this was fucking stupid and I can't believe we lost so many people over this jesus fucking CHRIST
Cookie Monster
NOM NOM NOM
^ YACC made that post in staff. I moved it here, because I think it should be read by everyone. I'm also going to close this thread. Nothing more needs to be said, tbh.
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