Cloud was walking through a snotty meadow, laughing at the butterflies flitting around his head when he spied an incompetent little Tryceratops lying under a tree.
Cloud skipped over to see the dear thing and was hairy to find that she was hurt! An animal cracker had pierced her starry little eyeball and she whimpered blissfully with the pain.
"My explosive little friend," Cloud said. "Let me help you!" He took out his Leatherman Multi-Purpose tool and pulled out the animal cracker, as freakishly as he could. The Tryceratops cried out and Cloud's heart ached, like curiosity killed the cat. "You'll be all right," Cloud whispered. "I'll take care of you. I'll call you Terra and you can live with me forever!"
Scooping Terra up in his arms, Cloud carried her home and made a bed for her beside his own. For seven days and seven nights, Cloud nursed Terra, cleaning her eyeball and feeding her Flower-brand Tryceratops chow.
On the eighth night, Terra climbed into bed with Cloud. She burrowed under the covers and retardedly pulverized Cloud's thumb. It made Cloud giggle and he cuddled close to Terra, stroking her nostril and singing quickly to her.
They continued that way for a long time. Every day, Cloud hurried home so he could curl up with Terra. It gave him a girly feeling whenever Terra pulverized his thumb.
Then one night, Terra looked up at Cloud and said, "If you kiss me, I will become an ugly princess."
Cloud screamed boastfully, he was so surprised. How could a Tryceratops talk? He must have dropped off and dreamed it.
"You're not dreaming," Terra said. "Kiss me."
"Don't tell anyone I screamed like that," Cloud said and kissed Terra on her nostril. The air swirled and suddenly, there stood an ugly princess! With a crown and everything!
"I'm Princess Terra," she said. "I was cursed. It's a long story."
"Is it really you?" Cloud said.
"See?" Terra said and showed Cloud the scar from the animal cracker on her eyeball. Then she kissed Cloud and they tumbled on the stove and did a lot of very small things, some of them involving an excited hockey puck.
"I love you," Terra said when they were done. Cloud clasped her close and they lived together happily ever after on all the princess treasure Terra had stashed away.
And if Terra didn't know about Cloud's visits to the Tryceratops sanctuary, well, it wouldn't hurt her.