I definitely agree that the pacing is out of wack in the final two chapters. I also agree that there were way too many "goodbyes' with Aerith that it made it not matter anymore in the end. I hope Part 3 at least helps alleviate the confusion as to what all of this means.
Sorry but no. Why are you comparing FF7 to Persona where romantic choices have absolutely no bearings whatsoever as far as the story goes?
There's a huge difference with a game like Persona that just throws this thing there to please players, versus a game like FF7 where your protags whole character setup involves romantic feelings with a specified character that only gets explored more and more as we go on with the games.
You don't choose Clouds background involving Tifa, what he feels towards her and vice versa, like you choose Ann or Makoto as your chosen "romantic interest" in P5.
It really is not just that simple here. I don't know why you think the optional dates here define the entire thing when the games clearly show and are building towards a very specific outcome regardless of which one of those you saw. The dates are there to establish how Cloud would be and feel with each specific person in said scenario. They don't decide what the canonical outcome to the story is, but instead they give you character insight.
Persona is a series where the protagonist has only small amounts of personality as he mostly meant to be a player-insert for the most part. People see Cloud as a self-insert but I never felt that way. In fact, most FF protagonists have very specific personalities. For other games, like Mass Effect or Dragon Age, the characters are designed to be role-played so that each playthrough can yield to different outcomes.
I don't think Final Fantasy 7 actually meets any of these criteria and you only have very slight input on differences in any given FF game, most of them do not leave much room for drastically different playthroughs in terms of the story stuff. No matter what you choose, Tifa stays with Cloud at Mideel out of love, Cloud always says one of his primary motivations to become SOLDIER was to be special to Tifa, etc. These are not things you can really change, and they exist for a reason.
Making this Cloud's motivation, then having it revealed as a plot twist is not something that can just be swept away as "it's up to the player". It has strong romantic implication because Tifa wanted Cloud to be her "knight in shining armor" and the big reveal was that he kept that promise to her even when she did not know it. He wanted to become a special existence to her and he did exactly that.
Why reveal that? Why make that such a huge part of the story? Only for it to be that it's up to the player?
Moreover, this sentiment seems to only exist with Final Fantasy 7. Not a single other FF game has made the romances ambiguous, they are all clearly defined with very little room for interpretation. Does Noctis like Iris? No, he clearly likes Luna. Tidus clearly likes Yuna, but I suppose we can interpret that he likes Lulu because it's a dialogue option we can choose. Can I interpret that Locke will reunite with Rachel once he dies so he's just using Celes for now?
I want to apologize to any normal fans if this sounds toxic but I don't mean it to be: I find that in a majority of cases where people that say that it's up to player preference seem to always lean towards Clerith, and I feel that's basically because subconsciously they know that it needs to be that way so that they can have their Clerith endgame.
I also think some of them don't even believe it themselves, as I've seen people respond to similar statements with "Well, okay... the way I saw it play it means that Cloti is endgame" which is then met with responses that seem to indicate that Aerith is supposed to be the main heroine and this is not the actual reading they should have gotten. As if to say "It's up to the player... but obviously the devs meant for Aerith to be the real choice."