FFVII CHARACTER SMACKDOWN - The Neutrals Championship

1. How does Cid even know where the Pilot is?
2. I know Cid has quite a carrying voice, but even he cannot shout on the Highwind and be heard in Kalm.
I'm sure you've noticed that in order to give the Pilot any instructions, you have to be standing right next to him.
If the Pilot is capable of thinking anything, he's probably thinking that he must have screwed up and Cid threw him out of the airship and that's how he got here.

Cid is an RPG protagonist. He will immediately prioritise an NPC sidequest over his immediate goals. Also, if they're in the middle of the mission, that means that the Highwind is grounded, therefore no decompression sickness.

If there's one thing a pilot needs, it's focus. You can't last long if you are easily distracted by interesting birds or cloud formations. He's able to keep focus with Tifa Lockhart (Current Holder of Shinra's "World's Most Beautiful International Terrorist" Award) standing directly in front of him.

Other crew members can be distracted from their duties by talking to them. Not this guy. He'll stay focused.

As a pilot, he'll have goggles to protect himself from Mace and Car Keys.

Beautiful Girl, however, is dressed for tropical Mideel, not an old man't unheated house (because he's still recovering in Fort Condor.) She won't be able to function in the cold, and school fight experience doesn't trump working with terrorists and the Shinra military.

Further, Beautiful Girl craves adventure, she's sick of her shop. On noticing her adversary is a pilot, she will want to know about his stories of travelling to far flung spots, and possibly even sign on with the crew for adventures. She's likely to just surrender in order to fly around with the Highwind Crew having adventures.

WOW I got so lost in the sauce that I missed this. Pretend that I posted this 36 minutes earlier lmao.


Friendly reminder to players that as of the 31st May, 21:34 GMT, you have less than 24 hours to sway Spectators.

Here's a link to a time zone converter in case anyone needs it.

Keep on keepin’ on!

Clement Rage said:

Cid is an RPG protagonist. He will immediately prioritise an NPC sidequest over his immediate goals. Also, if they're in the middle of the mission, that means that the Highwind is grounded, therefore no decompression sickness.

If there's one thing a pilot needs, it's focus. You can't last long if you are easily distracted by interesting birds or cloud formations. He's able to keep focus with Tifa Lockhart (Current Holder of Shinra's "World's Most Beautiful International Terrorist" Award) standing directly in front of him.

Other crew members can be distracted from their duties by talking to them. Not this guy. He'll stay focused.

As a pilot, he'll have goggles to protect himself from Mace and Car Keys.

Click to expand...

See, I don't think that's true. Cid might prioritise a sidequest that involves fighting the Shinra, but right now Meteor is in the sky and the danger is so urgent that he can't take time off to rescue one of his pilots. What's more, as I said before, if the Pilot is capable of winning this smackdown, then why does he need Cid to rescue him?

Sure. Tifa is beautiful. but BG is Beautiful. And there isn't any Cid around to terrorise the Pilot into focusing.

Beautiful Girl, however, is dressed for tropical Mideel, not an old man't unheated house (because he's still recovering in Fort Condor.) She won't be able to function in the cold, and school fight experience doesn't trump working with terrorists and the Shinra military.

Click to expand...

The Pilot just flies a plane. What's more, he's still in training. We can surmise he has not been working with Shinra for very long. We don't in fact knows that he has any fighting experience at all. He travels with Avalanche, but does he ever fight with them? No. Surely if he had any half-way decent combat skills he'd be out there at Fort Condor and Junon fighting the Shinra.

BG is Hot, man. She generates her own heat.

Further, Beautiful Girl craves adventure, she's sick of her shop. On noticing her adversary is a pilot, she will want to know about his stories of travelling to far flung spots, and possibly even sign on with the crew for adventures. She's likely to just surrender in order to fly around with the Highwind Crew having adventures.

Click to expand...

If there's one thing BG has had plenty of practice in, it's refusing to surrender to men. She may well crave adventure, it would not be out of character. But if she uses her assets to charm the Pilot into refusing to fight her, and if she further charms him into offering to introduce her to Cid and Avalanche, then I think that counts as a win for BG: she will have achieved her goals.

LicoriceAllsorts said:

1. How does Cid even know where the Pilot is?
2. I know Cid has quite a carrying voice, but even he cannot shout on the Highwind and be heard in Kalm.
I'm sure you've noticed that in order to give the Pilot any instructions, you have to be standing right next to him.
If the Pilot is capable of thinking anything, he's probably thinking that he must have screwed up and Cid threw him out of the airship and that's how he got here.

Click to expand...

He doesn't have to be there or know where the pilot is. The pilot is wearing a headset to communicate with the rest of the crew, primarily his captain.

The Pilot just flies a plane. What's more, he's still in training. We can surmise he has not been working with Shinra for very long. We don't in fact knows that he has any fighting experience at all. He travels with Avalanche, but does he ever fight with them? No. Surely if he had any half-way decent combat skills he'd be out there at Fort Condor and Junon fighting the Shinra.

Click to expand...

Long or not, we know that Rufus took the Highwind as his mode of transport of choice by the time he went to the Northern Continent, the ferry, helicopters and Tiny Bronco were improvisations because the Highwind wasn't ready yet. While Tifa was in a coma for week, Barret reassures us that Rufus has been taking the fight to the Weapons the entire time. The pilot was handpicked for the most dangerous missions, him still being in training only means it can't be solely for his skill as a pilot that he was selected, he has been in and out of combat scenerios since the Weapons appeared and AVALANCHE has not always been there to help.

If there's one thing BG has had plenty of practice in, it's refusing to surrender to men. She may well crave adventure, it would not be out of character. But if she uses her assets to charm the Pilot into refusing to fight her, and if she further charms him into offering to introduce her to Cid and Avalanche, then I think that counts as a win for BG: she will have achieved her goals.

Click to expand...

That is NOT true, sir. Having helped her to achieve an arbitrary goal of her choicing is NOT a win condition, these are rancid lies. The ref already clarified to you once that the opponent needs to be rendered unable to fight at all, whether that is physically, mentally or existentially.

So if her charm renders the Pilot unwilling to fight her, she wins?

Make love, not war.

LicoriceAllsorts said:

Clement Rage said:

Cid is an RPG protagonist. He will immediately prioritise an NPC sidequest over his immediate goals. Also, if they're in the middle of the mission, that means that the Highwind is grounded, therefore no decompression sickness.

If there's one thing a pilot needs, it's focus. You can't last long if you are easily distracted by interesting birds or cloud formations. He's able to keep focus with Tifa Lockhart (Current Holder of Shinra's "World's Most Beautiful International Terrorist" Award) standing directly in front of him.

Other crew members can be distracted from their duties by talking to them. Not this guy. He'll stay focused.

As a pilot, he'll have goggles to protect himself from Mace and Car Keys.

Click to expand...

See, I don't think that's true. Cid might prioritise a sidequest that involves fighting the Shinra, but right now Meteor is in the sky and the danger is so urgent that he can't take time off to rescue one of his pilots. What's more, as I said before, if the Pilot is capable of winning this smackdown, then why does he need Cid to rescue him?

Sure. Tifa is beautiful. but BG is Beautiful. And there isn't any Cid around to terrorise the Pilot into focusing.

Beautiful Girl, however, is dressed for tropical Mideel, not an old man't unheated house (because he's still recovering in Fort Condor.) She won't be able to function in the cold, and school fight experience doesn't trump working with terrorists and the Shinra military.

Click to expand...

The Pilot just flies a plane. What's more, he's still in training. We can surmise he has not been working with Shinra for very long. We don't in fact knows that he has any fighting experience at all. He travels with Avalanche, but does he ever fight with them? No. Surely if he had any half-way decent combat skills he'd be out there at Fort Condor and Junon fighting the Shinra.

BG is Hot, man. She generates her own heat.

Further, Beautiful Girl craves adventure, she's sick of her shop. On noticing her adversary is a pilot, she will want to know about his stories of travelling to far flung spots, and possibly even sign on with the crew for adventures. She's likely to just surrender in order to fly around with the Highwind Crew having adventures.

Click to expand...

If there's one thing BG has had plenty of practice in, it's refusing to surrender to men. She may well crave adventure, it would not be out of character. But if she uses her assets to charm the Pilot into refusing to fight her, and if she further charms him into offering to introduce her to Cid and Avalanche, then I think that counts as a win for BG: she will have achieved her goals.

Click to expand...

This is the same party that delays going to Sephiroth to breed Chocobos and ride rollercoasters.

Pilot doesn't need Cid, but it's a nice bonus. He can focus all by himself, it's necessary for his job. He doesn't fight because they can't afford to lose their pilot, but he pilots a military craft, he has to have some combat training.

If there's one thing BG has had plenty of practice in, it's refusing to surrender to men. She may well crave adventure, it would not be out of character. But if she uses her assets to charm the Pilot into refusing to fight her, and if she further charms him into offering to introduce her to Cid and Avalanche, then I think that counts as a win for BG: she will have achieved her goals

Click to expand...

Untrue. BG didn't want to settle in Mideel. She wants to live somewhere more exciting. But she settled there anyway, because it was what her husband wanted. That's not the action of someone that never takes no for an answer.

You could equally argue that Pilot has charmed BG into not fighting him. But I'd argue that the Pilot has more leverage here. He has access to something she wants, whereas there are beautiful girls all over the world, including her identical clone in Junon.

But he was working tho

Who’s disposition would be most shaken in the middle of this? BG, likely a little weirded out and maybe even a little chilly, but she’s been around the block once or twice and more than knows how to handle herself.

The Pilot, however, suddenly plucked from the midst of flying an airship during dangerous missions, running from powerful men, chasing a known murderer, shaken from yet another snide remark made by the man who’s approval he most seeks to gain. His nerves must be shot to all hell. Plus he’s got the decompression sickness.

YES, I AM GOING BACK TO THAT.

I absolutely believe the likelihood of his flying the airship when the smackdown happens is quite high! How often have players rode around the Planet on the Highwind just gliding through continents over and over out of boredom? Or even just sat there for a moment contemplating where to go next? Maybe you even put the controller down and went to go fix yourself a sandwich? Am I the only one who’s done that lmao? Ran around trying to find WEAPONs to beat up? Admit it!

Furthermore, look at him.


He has a headset on and everything, suggesting he was in the middle of a job. He even looks like he’s in the midst of shouting into it for goodness sakes. Likely, “I’m sorry Captain, it won’t happen again Captain!” Now, I’ve never been a pilot, but I’ve certainly worked in fields where headsets were a must and, I’ll tell you, I’ve yet to ever bring my headset or any such work equipment with me to lunch, on a break, or any such downtime. So because he’s dressed and ready to be handling the ship, my guess is that he was, well, handling the ship when the smackdown happened.

What a twist of bad luck...

I’m about to lose my electricity so have some gansta rap

BG or Beautiful Gangsta in the streets
Get them hands and neck sweatin’ every time you meet
She’ll defeat
Any punkass gettin’ in her way
You messin’ with BG? You make it worth her day

BG or Beautiful Gangsta in the club
One look and she got fools wantin’ to be called her “hub”
She ain’t no sub!
Chick eats dudes like Pilot for second breakfast
It’s lonely on top when you’re the bestest

BG or Beautiful Gangsta in the ghetto
Bruh, she’ll fuck you up, that much we know
NO
-body can stop my homegirl now
In the presence of greatest, Pilot had better bow

*jazz outro*

*record scratch*

This marks the end of round 1-8!

Spectators (and the audience!*) have 24 hours to cast their votes (either by posting in this thread or messaging me privately) for the champion that they have been swayed to stand behind. Your judges are...


At this time, spectators and audience members are allowed to post their thoughts on the match. Players are NOT ALLOWED to counter any of these comments with new arguments or to continue ‘battling’ in general. Any attempt to do so will count as an automatic loss for your team. Players are free, however, to pay compliments to your opponents and such. ^^

Players!

If you’d like to opt out of participating in the next round, tell me so now.. Otherwise, I’m going to assume you’re still playing and you’re going to be reshuffled into a new team.

In General

If anyone (players, spectators, audience, anyone) has any feedback, questions, or concerns regarding the rules, please post that in the master thread here. It’ll be easier for me to keep track of/find your feedback this way for future reference. Thank you!

Any non-participant who’d like to be shuffled into a team, please say so now.

Thank you to spectators and audience members who voted!

Spoiler: Round 1-8’s Winner is…

VICTORY GOES TO TEAM CHOCOBO

Spoiler: Spectator’s MVP

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*FancySycamoreTree*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

LAST ROUND AHEAD!!

ROUND 1-9 Last Batcha Rounds


Choco Billy - The grandson of Choco Bill who knows the basics of Chocobos and handles the lure …
Are you ready Team Chocobo?

Ester - The best dang chocobo racing manager there ever was and resident of Gold Saucer…
Are you ready Team Moogle?

___________________

The countdown begins when the first team player posts!

In the left corner...!

Choco Billy: the scrappy, farm-hardened, all weather, extremely bright young man who is at the forefront of running the famous Chocobo Farm! Used to wrangling chocobo, seeing off chocobo rustlers, and generally kicking ass.

In the right corner...!

Ester: the flirty fashionista with a penchant for chocobo racing and hanging out at the Gold Saucer. Questionable taste in men. Let's face it, she indulges in a rich girl's hobby because that's what she is. A rich girl who has just never had to experience the knocks of a hard world. Has she ever even ridden a chocobo? We just don't know.


Ladies, gentlemen, others, we gather here today to witness this plucky young farmer go head to head with a woman who spends much of her time trying to maximise the volume of her hair. Is this even a contest? I think the bet is not on who wins, but on how quickly Choco Billy can trounce the young lady.

Whether this contest is an old fashioned fist fight or a chocobo race, Choco Billy has the versatility and the gumption to win!

I'm not going to deny Choco Billy is strong, because that's the same argument I used in defense of Chloe: working on a farm builds muscles. And that's Billy: all brawn and very little brain. Yes, sadly he's a bit of a local yokel. He's not smart enough to run the farm. Choco Bill does that; Choco Bill handles all the finances. Choco Billy isn't even allowed in the house: he stays in the barn to answer questions. But not just any questions. He has a small set of questions whose answers he has memorised, and that's it, that's all he can tell you. He always offers you the same options in the same order, even if he's just answered one of them. He can't take them questions out of order; it would muddle him too much. Why, even when you only have one chocobo in the yard, he asks you which one you want to put in the stable!

There's only one thing he and Ester have in common, and that's the ability to recognise a good bird when they see it. Looks like our Billy is a bit of an idiot savant.

As for Ester - that woman has balls. She orders Mr Coats around. She 'has a word' with Dio. When she gives an order, the men jump to it, whether they're the lowliest criminal or the billionaire owner of Gold Saucer.

Ester doesn't just manage jockeys. This woman trains chocobos too. She says as much to Cloud: "This is a Chocobo I prepared myself. He won't lose easily."

He won't lose easily. The same is true of our Ester. This classy lady has confidence to spare! She'll soon have Choco Billy eating out of her hand, just like every other bird - and man - she meets.

Let's talk about equipment. AT the peak of Cloud's career as a professional chocobo racer, Ester rewards him with Sprint Shoes (automatically start battle with Haste), Cat's Bell (Recover HP with every step), a Chocobracelet (provides formidable Defense, Magic Defense, Dexterity and Luck stats) and a Counterattack Materia. I don't think this poor child is capable of harming Ester decked out such as she is, and Counterattack being an automatic ability, Ester can even avoid killing Billy in self defense. It will be a terribly tragic display but the victor here cannot really be in dispute.

SHITE STARTED FROM RIGHT UNDER MY NOSE

Let the record show that the battle phase of Round 1-9 was initiated by Team Chocobo on 3 June, 14:20 GMT.

All players have until...
5 June, 14:20 GMT
...to sway their spectators.

Here's a link to a time zone converter in case anyone needs it.

Final round for a little while! Best of luck!

Minato said:

Let's talk about equipment. AT the peak of Cloud's career as a professional chocobo racer, Ester rewards him with Sprint Shoes (automatically start battle with Haste), Cat's Bell (Recover HP with every step), a Chocobracelet (provides formidable Defense, Magic Defense, Dexterity and Luck stats) and a Counterattack Materia. I don't think this poor child is capable of harming Ester decked out such as she is, and Counterattack being an automatic ability, Ester can even avoid killing Billy in self defense. It will be a terribly tragic display but the victor here cannot really be in dispute.

Click to expand...

Is it Ester who gives out these rewards, or is the Gold Saucer? I think you'll find Ester wouldn't wear Sprint Shoes - they wouldn't match her ensemble.

LiquoriceAllsorts said:

I'm not going to deny Choco Billy is strong, because that's the same argument I used in defense of Chloe: working on a farm builds muscles. And that's Billy: all brawn and very little brain. Yes, sadly he's a bit of a local yokel. He's not smart enough to run the farm. Choco Bill does that; Choco Bill handles all the finances. Choco Billy isn't even allowed in the house: he stays in the barn to answer questions. But not just any questions. He has a small set of questions whose answers he has memorised, and that's it, that's all he can tell you. He always offers you the same options in the same order, even if he's just answered one of them. He can't take them questions out of order; it would muddle him too much. Why, even when you only have one chocobo in the yard, he asks you which one you want to put in the stable!

Click to expand...

An idiot savant? He runs the vegetable store, selling a wide variety of greens and nuts -- and that means he has a great skill in recognising different plant life. He's a merchant and a botanist, both of which require quick wits and a good memory.


As to not being allowed in the house, why would Choco Bill have a room with three beds, if not to sleep himself and his two grandkids? No, they all bed down there, except when they have rented it out to travellers, at which point they all sleep in the stables. Choco Billy doesn't mind sleeping rough - whereas Ester probably throws a fit if she doesn't get a feather mattress stuffed with the finest Chocobo down!

I'm not going to deny that Ester appreciates the good things in life, but that doesn't mean she can't rough it and tough it when she needs to. We're talking about a woman who's equally at ease down in Corel Prison or up in the winner's enclosure of Gold Saucer. This lady know how to conduct herself in every situation.

She doesn't 'throw a fit' when Mr Coats insults her; she doesn't 'throw a fit' when Cloud loses a race. She just gets on and does what needs to be done. Choco Billy can't do a thing unless someone gives him an order. He's a boy who needs to be taken in hand and she's the woman to do it.

Ester? Wouldn't Miss Her!

The shock! The horror! The attempts at defamation of the innocent choco family! Enough Team Moogle!

Choco Billy comes from humble roots—a family-owned farm on the far east side of the eastern continent, far far away from the hustle and bustle of Midgar and city life. But Pappy, as Choco Billy affectionately calls his grandpa, ain’t rear no fool!

Speaking of his grandfather…

Ain’t it curious that he’s the sole caretaker of the two kids on his farm? What happened to Choco William, his father, or Chana, his mother?

Chocobo. That’s what happened.

Everyone thinks chocobos are these cute, fluffy creatures who will just eat out of any randy’s hand and be domesticated. NAH. A step too close to a nest of baby chocobos with it’s mother about and these birds will maul the shit out of you with their razor sharp beaks. And that’s what happened to William and Chana. They took that step too close. And Billy might’ve fallen victim to the same fate if he hadn’t been so quick on his feet. The piece of bandage across his nose serves as a constant reminder of that day.

So, excuse him if he comes across as a little slow or needs to ask the same questions over and over when you greet. He needs that sort of order in his life after suffering such chaos and trauma!

You see, women like Ester can’t appreciate this sort of thing. She handles birds that have already been domesticated. Bird with spirits that have long been broken. And when she says she’s ‘handled’ by the way, she’s actually referring to her assistants, but they’re “not like real people,” so why would she credit them, right? Tsk tsk. Typical of the spoiled and rich. But folks like the choco family...?


I want you to look again at that piece of bandage and remember his fallen parents.

Ester would underestimate Choco Billy. She’s a busy woman—she doesn’t have time to be bothered with snot-nosed brats! Or so she would think. She’d approach Billy ready to bully him into submission, but Billy would surprise her. He’s resourceful—you learn to be that way when you deal with killer chocobos on a regular basis. He’d grab the latest issue of SHINRA MONTHLY off one of those lounge tables, roll it right up, and give Ester a good WHACK there and WHACK here, weaving in between her legs and using his seemingly boundless stamina to dodge her attempts to stop him and ducking into hard-to-fit spaces. Maybe he’d chew a piece of gum, macgyver a sling-shot out of rubber bands, and fling it into her hair. The possibilities are endless.

Moogle suggests that Ester isn’t a woman easily frustrated. Well, today is that day that patience is worn right out.

Think my colleagues have this covered, but anyway...

Any Chocobo handling bonuses apply to both of these characters and cancel out.

But Ester doesn't just deal with Chocobos. She also deals with criminals, both to help them escape Corel prison and because fraudsters and strongarms are easly drawn to high stakes gambling. You need to be hardcore to keep your favourite bird from being poisoned by a rival or a jockey's legs broken by the Corneos because they won a race they were meant to lose. Ester has lived this long by being quick on the draw and taking no prisoners, in the high stakes world of professional gambling. Choco Billy, on the other hand, is only challenged by taking care of Chocobos that are well secured in stables (he doesn't even need to catch any himself.)

Friendly reminder to players that as of the 4 June, 14:21 GMT, you have less than 24 hours to sway Spectators.

Here's a link to a time zone converter in case anyone needs it.

Keep on keepin’ on!

Clement Rage said:

But Ester doesn't just deal with Chocobos. She also deals with criminals, both to help them escape Corel prison and because fraudsters and strongarms are easly drawn to high stakes gambling. You need to be hardcore to keep your favourite bird from being poisoned by a rival or a jockey's legs broken by the Corneos because they won a race they were meant to lose. Ester has lived this long by being quick on the draw and taking no prisoners, in the high stakes world of professional gambling. Choco Billy, on the other hand, is only challenged by taking care of Chocobos that are well secured in stables (he doesn't even need to catch any himself.)

Click to expand...

Ester doesn't 'deal with criminals'. She's the pretty face that represents a well-oiled machine. Dyne/Mr Coates is the one who decides who gets to go up to race. And the Chocobo Races themselves are well managed by Dio and his crew (with a little help from Shinra themselves). Ester is the glorified elevator operator, who imparts a few tips on jockeying on the way.

She may have raised a few well-bred chocobo... but almost certainly with the help of a staff. For the most part, she just seems to stand around in the foyer of the chocobo square, watching the screens. How many successful jockey's has she even coached, anyway? What does she even do? Is that elevator pitch the sole extant of her 'coaching'?

Whereas Billy is always hard at work, feeding, mating, and exercising chocobo - many of which have been caught in the wild, and are difficult to handle!

Clement Rage said:

Ester doesn't 'deal with criminals'. She's the pretty face that represents a well-oiled machine. Dyne/Mr Coates is the one who decides who gets to go up to race. And the Chocobo Races themselves are well managed by Dio and his crew (with a little help from Shinra themselves). Ester is the glorified elevator operator, who imparts a few tips on jockeying on the way.

She may have raised a few well-bred chocobo... but almost certainly with the help of a staff. For the most part, she just seems to stand around in the foyer of the chocobo square, watching the screens. How many successful jockey's has she even coached, anyway? What does she even do? Is that elevator pitch the sole extant of her 'coaching'?

Whereas Billy is always hard at work, feeding, mating, and exercising chocobo - many of which have been caught in the wild, and are difficult to handle!

Click to expand...

Yes, Billy is always hard at work.... standing there waiting for someone to ask him questions. When do we ever see him feeding chocobos, exercising chocobos, mucking out the chocobo stalls, mating chocobos? He just tells the customers what to do and then they do it.

Whereas with Ester we know for a fact that she's a hard working gal. Coates himself says, "There's no better manager in the races." She knows everything there is to know about how to handle chocobos and race to win. Her services are highly sought after. If you're with Ester, then everybody knows you're an up and coming jockey. She trains chocobos that don't lose easily. And, finally, she has the ear and trust of Dio. When she tells him Cloud and co were framed, he immediately believes her.

Ester is a woman of importance at Gold Saucer, and all the men respect her, not for what she looks like, but for the quality of the work she does.

InterfaceLeader said:

Clement Rage said:

But Ester doesn't just deal with Chocobos. She also deals with criminals, both to help them escape Corel prison and because fraudsters and strongarms are easly drawn to high stakes gambling. You need to be hardcore to keep your favourite bird from being poisoned by a rival or a jockey's legs broken by the Corneos because they won a race they were meant to lose. Ester has lived this long by being quick on the draw and taking no prisoners, in the high stakes world of professional gambling. Choco Billy, on the other hand, is only challenged by taking care of Chocobos that are well secured in stables (he doesn't even need to catch any himself.)

Click to expand...

Ester doesn't 'deal with criminals'. She's the pretty face that represents a well-oiled machine. Dyne/Mr Coates is the one who decides who gets to go up to race. And the Chocobo Races themselves are well managed by Dio and his crew (with a little help from Shinra themselves). Ester is the glorified elevator operator, who imparts a few tips on jockeying on the way.

She may have raised a few well-bred chocobo... but almost certainly with the help of a staff. For the most part, she just seems to stand around in the foyer of the chocobo square, watching the screens. How many successful jockey's has she even coached, anyway? What does she even do? Is that elevator pitch the sole extant of her 'coaching'?

Whereas Billy is always hard at work, feeding, mating, and exercising chocobo - many of which have been caught in the wild, and are difficult to handle!

Click to expand...

Dyne, a man that wants the entire world to burn is the one that selects which of his fellow criminals get sent up the elevator with Ester until Barret arrives. If it's a well-oiled machine, it's because Ester is the one that keeps it clean. Just because Cloud is a quick on the uptake and has outrun the Midgar Zolom on a Chocobo's back before ever applying to the races doesn't mean every racer has. Ester is the best manager in what is thriving business already that attracts a crowd of people betting on races (unlike Billy's deserted stables) because she can cow any hardened criminal into getting on a chocobo and follow her instructions.

This woman is going down in a scrap with a preteen boy? I don't think so.

Have you ever had a fight with a scrappy 12 year old boy? They are quick, they bite, they have sharp knees and elbows, and an inexhaustible supply of energy. Sure, Ester is a bit taller, but even if she does have better coaching skills than we see, coaching hardly translates into physical strength, durability, or speed.

Sure, Ester would do great coaching someone else to fight. But she isn't coaching right now, she's on the spot, she's the one that has to fight... and there is ZERO evidence presented so far that she would do anything more than flail helplessly.

If she can handle hardened criminals it's less about her intimidating presence and more about what she offers - a chance to get out of prison, and a chance to win fame and fortune. The people she works with are pre-selected, and desperate to escape... they won't be fighting her, they are invested students.

But Billy? Billy grew up with an older sister, in a remote area of the country surrounded by monsters. He ain't no fool - and the tragic death of his parents instilled him a sense of caution and respect for both chocobo and monsters. What keeps the monsters of the grasslands from over-running the farm? Only the ceaseless work of the Choco family, all of whom take turns patrolling the boundary of their farm, and dealing with the varmints that might try and sneak in.

Youth and experience are both on the side of our champion, Choco Billy!