Who is the Chocobo Sage, what is he? He has a rounded bottom with no legs, seems to float like Bugenhagen, and bears a passing resemblance to the purple creature from the Temple of the Ancients. Is he human? Is he a Cetra? Nobody knows. The secret of his true identity has been closely guarded for many centuries, but I can now exclusively reveal that he is, in fact, a Weeble. And as we all know, weebles wobble, but
they don't fall down.
Yes, the Chocobo Sage has a memory as wobbly as his body, but he won't fall down. Do you think he has lived to be 2,873 years old by being nervous and easily frightened? This - entity - lives all alone in a hut in an isolated, vlakrados-infested valley, his only companion a green chocobo, on whom, presumably, he travels the mountains of the Northern Continent whenever he isn't handing out breeding tips to any rare sojourners who make the effort to seek him out. Such a life is not for the weak or the easily disheartened.
The Chocobo Sage may wobble, but he
won't fall down.
We know two things for certain about Mayor Domino
1. He is willing to trade company secrets with random hoodlums:
"You want to get upstairs? I tell you what, if you can guess the password, I'll give you my keycard. Yes, that's it. Guess the password and I'll give you my keycard!"
I mean, the Shinra Manager could tell at a glance that Cloud & Co were hoodlums, but maybe Mayor Domino doesn't get out enough. Maybe he's just not familiar with the mean streets of Midgar.
2. He relies on other people to fight his battles:
"Why would I do something like this, you ask? To mess with them, of course! Shinra's been torturing me forever. That's why I was a little rough on you all just now. Now go up there and really make them suffer."
One could argue that Mayor Domino doesn't fall down either, and that's true. You can't fall down if you never stand up for yourself in the first place.
