Disappointed in Mod Response

[Tifabelle]

I'd like to note there that I've been away from the internet for a solid 18-ish hours and was not the someone mentioned in Belle's post.

Oh I just noticed this. No, it wasn't kimble. Doesn't matter who it was anyway. The suggestion wasn't in a negative way, or trying to incite drama. They knew I was bothered by what had happened and I had said that I was going to leave TLS for a few days, but they suggested that if it bothered me that much that maybe I should voice my concerns. And I took that suggestion and weighed it for a good like three or four hours before I posted.

 

[Joker]

Also, UN was pretty much permabanned at the point he was told to FOAD, I think. If I'm wrong there, correct me. Anyways, Permanently banned/ flounced members are treated differently than currently active ones, regardless of how we might feel about them.

And yet they should not. I haven't even mentioned who it was, and yet you acknowledge that it was a member of staff, who should be holding themselves to a higher standard of proper conduct - or, at the very least, the same standard as everyone else. The fact that username has made so many dupes does not make this acceptable behavior, period. :'

 

[Max Payne]

I encouraged her to post it.

A few others probably did to.

 

[Celes Chere]

"Fuck you" is pretty insulting.

... if someone is offended by "fuck you" I worry XD Also when "please leave me alone" doesn't work, it's time to be a bit forceful.

, but there are always two sides to every story

Yeah, the truth and what she makes up. =/

But anyway, I do agree that it's perfectly fine for her to come in here and defend herself, I just worry that she will give the same apology like she always does, and then go back to doing the same shit because this has happened three separate times including now. And I really am just fed up. Her post over in the ruins your day thread, pretty much is her defense, saying how her 'friends' read my page for her now. First of all, why are her 'friends' reading my blog under a cut when the title of the subject is 'personal'? Obviously she is snooping into my things a bit too much, and it bothers me that people outside of the situation will see her as a 'sincerely sorry' person that 'didn't mean it'. Sorry, but that's all bullshit and she is full of it. She says the same thing about TLS. I really don't want to see her crappy defense, but she has a right to it just as anyone else.

I realize that is a totally biased post but whatever lol

 

[Tetsujin]

"Fuck you" is not insulting.

Cock-juggling thundercunt would be.

 

[looneymoon]

From the responses I've seen from her in the past, it seems like the apology routine is what's in store. I think she's under the impression that saying you're sorry automatically means everything is okay and you're friends now. She probably has no idea that what she is doing is harassment, let alone stalker-ish. I'm not convinced she knows what she's apologizing for.

On the other hand AS MUCH AS I HATE TO SAY IT BECAUSE I LOVE YOU GUYS...
Kripey, Sammi, friends, everyone etc. I don't think it was the most tactful thing for you guys to get involved in such a huge, personal capacity? Especially when it comes to dealing with someone who clearly has inferiority/attention issues. Maybe it's a retrospective type thing, but I don't think it helped mitigating the issue. In fact I get the impression that having the whole community involved with what is essentially a problem between two people (+the mod team) has probably made things worse and more dramatic than they need be. I mean I know she's been acting horrible to one member but... how necessary was it to get all your friends and stuff involved?

I know Tiff is our friend and we all love her and all, but (please mind I'm slightly playing devil's advocate here) looking through this thread I can kind of understand how someone may have the impression that this place is incredibly clique-ish. While she is welcome to post her defense, I could definitely understand why she would feel uncomfortable doing so. I mean she can defend herself yeah, but it's like we have a bunch of people just waiting to jump down her throat.

idk i'll shut up i love you guys i just wanna be friends with everyone

 

[Zealkin]

Don't know if you need anymore evidence, but there was another argument about this on Que's forum which had erupted from here, I had no idea where it had come from but the results were pretty much the same.

 

[Ryushikaze]

And yet they should not.

Are you arguing that permabanned members should be treated exactly like regular, active, contributing members of the forum?

I haven't even mentioned who it was, and yet you acknowledge that it was a member of staff,

I... No. I did not. Heck, I'm not even sure where you got that out of my wording, to be perfectly frank.

who should be holding themselves to a higher standard of proper conduct - or, at the very least, the same standard as everyone else. The fact that username has made so many dupes does not make this acceptable behavior, period. :'

Y'know, since you have someone in mind here, how about you just name a name instead of saying I 'acknowledged it was a member of staff.'

Because I just did a search for the phrase, and since last October, that phrase has come up seven times.

Three of those were from L, one was from you just now, one directed at wisdom teeth, and others used in the debate thread in a general sense.
Of those, only one had anything to do with user, and that's your post.

User was permabanned long before this time.

So who said this and when was it said, because I'm not finding that phrase used against User.

 

[Tifabelle]

Just to put out there, I do take it personally when someone I'm friends with is harrassed, sorry. And I've stood up for people in the past who aren't my friends as well. It's my personality, or how I was raised, but I'm not going to change and I'm not going to apologize for it.

On that note, I didn't get initially get personally involved aside from advising Tiff to ignore her, then telling her to ask her to leave her alone. (in other words, I tried to advise her on how to handle the situation without just randomly jumping in.) But when the girl didn't get the message and lied about what happened, I felt the need to step in. Tiff didn't ask anyone else to get involved, I did that of my own volition and without consulting her first. And I'd do it again, tyvm. Don't think I'd like to be the kind of person that doesn't stand up for a friend.

 

[Celes Chere]

Well Rishi, you're a better person than I am! The thing is though, multiple times people have been supportive of her, and she still continues the same thing. Now I truly feel bad if she has trust issues, personal issues, but she needs to deal with that. Plenty of people (Like Tenny) have offered to be an ear to listen if she needed it. Plenty of people have encouraged her to make friends, to NOT kill herself, and to that she says:
"everyone hates me"
If she is truly depressed, she should not be posting on the internet. She should not be taking her depression/trust issues out on me, and others. Her issues are no excuse for her to be doing this. This is why I would like for something to be done. Now if others feel it's too extreme to ban her, I am fine with her being banned if she contacts me again. I think that is fair. Then next time this happens, I can simply report her post, she'll be banned fairly, and we will be done with it.

I don't think she understands anything at all, because she will not listen. She reads one thing, and thinks it means another. She thinks that everyone on the entire Forum worships me or something, which just isn't true. There are plenty of people willing to be fair with her and listen to her - I won't be one of those people obviously, because I'm tired.

However if she would like to post what she says, I will stay out of it. Because I'm done responding to her period. If you guys want to read it and believe what you want, please do proceed to do so. All I really want is the Mods to do something, and they have agreed to do something the next time an issue arises and I'm fine with that. But I'm done responding to her, period.

And what Kripey says is true.. I didn't ask anyone get involved. They read my profile and saw her harrassing me and they reported what she said and nothing happened, so...

 

[Cat Rage Room]

Just to put out there, I do take it personally when someone I'm friends with is harrassed, sorry. And I've stood up for people in the past who aren't my friends as well. It's my personality, or how I was raised, but I'm not going to change and I'm not going to apologize for it.

I don't think that's what Looney meant. I think she meant that perhaps everyone shouldn't have gotten involved in such a public capacity. Standing up for your friends is different from making a spectacle of what's essentially a private matter.

I still think this all would have been avoided if we just banned the offender in the first place what hey whatever I don't know shit I guess.

 

[Madame Mayor]

I'm sorry if this has been said but I've only been able to skim through the thread.

I think the issue here is not that this is a problem between Tiff and Yoshi (this is the only name I saw in her aka long enough), but that this is a problem member who is now causing issues directly at Tiff. What I mean is, she's been a problem for a long time with drama threads, massive negativity towards multiple members, and is not contributing very much positively at all to this community.

What she's doing now with Tiff just seems to be the worst of it because she's targeting someone specifically. I know it's been commented on being between two people and therefore they should resolve their differences but the way I see it she's been acting bad towards many people for a long time and now it's worse that she's decided to focus and harass one person.

I thought her actions demanded a ban a long time ago and I think harassment of a member goes far beyond the requirements.

 

[Super Mario]

Can't we just ban her if she's causing this much grievance to one member? It might explode into many more members, hell even when I left I hear tale of her stalking me. This has to be considered if it is still not resolved up to now.

 

[Gym Leader Devil]

Just to put out there, I do take it personally when someone I'm friends with is harrassed, sorry. And I've stood up for people in the past who aren't my friends as well. It's my personality, or how I was raised, but I'm not going to change and I'm not going to apologize for it.

On that note, I didn't get initially get personally involved aside from advising Tiff to ignore her, then telling her to ask her to leave her alone. (in other words, I tried to advise her on how to handle the situation without just randomly jumping in.) But when the girl didn't get the message and lied about what happened, I felt the need to step in. Tiff didn't ask anyone else to get involved, I did that of my own volition and without consulting her first. And I'd do it again, tyvm. Don't think I'd like to be the kind of person that doesn't stand up for a friend.

I wish to share these words of yours Kripey. No one asked me to stick my nose into the feud between Tiff and Yoshi (I do think we should all pick a name for her and stick to it, and we know she went by Yoshi at one time). I asked Tiff what was bothering her so much, then if it had been reported, if anything had come of the reports... and then I stuck my nose in anyway, largely via rage-fest.

Answering your question from many pages back Tenny, you PMed me to say that Yoshi was very upset and just wanted me to stop messaging her. I replied that such was my goal in the matter from the start and I would indeed stop. I should also like to point out that the feeling was very much mutual and I have since found myself conversing with her on my profile because I didn't know who I was talking to due to the aka field fuckery others have brought up. So yeah, its nowhere near as nasty as what my lil sis has had to deal with, but she's gone back on a mutual "let's never speak to each other again" on me too.

 

[crack]

On the other hand AS MUCH AS I HATE TO SAY IT BECAUSE I LOVE YOU GUYS...
Kripey, Sammi, friends, everyone etc. I don't think it was the most tactful thing for you guys to get involved in such a huge, personal capacity? Especially when it comes to dealing with someone who clearly has inferiority/attention issues. Maybe it's a retrospective type thing, but I don't think it helped mitigating the issue. In fact I get the impression that having the whole community involved with what is essentially a problem between two people (+the mod team) has probably made things worse and more dramatic than they need be. I mean I know she's been acting horrible to one member but... how necessary was it to get all your friends and stuff involved?

I know Tiff is our friend and we all love her and all, but (please mind I'm slightly playing devil's advocate here) looking through this thread I can kind of understand how someone may have the impression that this place is incredibly clique-ish. While she is welcome to post her defense, I could definitely understand why she would feel uncomfortable doing so. I mean she can defend herself yeah, but it's like we have a bunch of people just waiting to jump down her throat.

idk i'll shut up i love you guys i just wanna be friends with everyone

no one would have had to been involved in such a huge, personal capacity if anything had actually been done in the first place. yoshi has been harassing tiff for months. the mods told tiff and yoshi to ignore each other, but i don't know how great of a solution that is when yoshi is constantly trying to incite tiff from all corners of the internet. tiff or anyone in support of tiff shouldn't be held at fault for the drama this situation has unraveled, especially when yoshi is the one provoking others to reply and be argumentative. i don't think getting other people involved in it is making the situation worse, either - you're gonna eventually feel inclined to step up and help when nothing about the problem is being fixed.

also, if the roles were reversed and tiff was the one harassing yoshi, no friend of tiff would have defended her actions. and being a friend of tiff's, i feel comfortable enough to call out on any bullshit tiff might ever (POSSIBLY) commit. like if she were to post homestuck yaoi everywhere D: and any good friend of a friend would do the same. so just because tiff is a ~popular and loved~ member on the forum doesn't warrant sympathy for me on yoshi's part. because i'll be blunt, she has been harassing tiff in inconceivable levels of annoyance.

 

[looneymoon]

aaa I'm not trying to vilify any of you for your actions Under ordinary circumstances I would probably be inclined to stick up for my friend too.

But at the same time

you're kind of dealing with someone who is:
a) incredibly emotionally unstable
b) attention seeking
c) a troll
d) possibly all of the above

I think in those kinds of instances it's... probably not the best idea to give her what she's asking for? Once again it might be a retroactive thing, it might be not knowing the specific details on my part, but it seems to me the drama of it all has fueled her behaviour/victim complex/trolling.

I mean I realize it's come to a point where outright ignoring her won't work... but idk it's tricky because I can't honestly say for sure if she's actually very troubled or just a troll. Erring on the side of caution and assuming the former, I'm hoping we (as a community, but staff more particularly) could facilitate a more comfortable environment where she can say her piece without the being ganged up on. Lord knows this place already has a bad rep for being clique-ish and secular.

 

[Cookie Monster]

She is free to PM me her response if she's uncomfortable posting here.

 

[Celes Chere]

Well like I said, I promise I will let her say her piece in peace (lol). Because I am done with her. I'm tired of reading her bullshit lies, so I won't be remarking on it. I appreciate what you're saying Rishi and I get what you mean, but I don't necessarily agree. It's different to me because she's directly harassing me and it really has come to the point where I would probably stay away from TLS if she keeps it up. That's why I thought something should be said once we were encouraged to make this thread. It's good of you to try and see all sides, but I just can't and I know that's my bias. I'm sorry, but anyone that has sympathy for her I believe is being fooled by her lies, and it just makes me more upset. Moreover, I just agree with everyone saying if this was handled sooner this all wouldn't be happening. So yeah idk if she's even seen this thread? But if she'd like to place her input I promise not to gang up on her.

 

[crack]

you're kind of dealing with someone who is:
a) incredibly emotionally unstable
b) attention seeking
c) a troll
d) possibly all of the above

I think in those kinds of instances it's... probably not the best idea to give her what she's asking for? Once again it might be a retroactive thing, it might be not knowing the specific details on my part, but it seems to me the drama of it all has fueled her behaviour/victim complex/trolling.

if she is a troll: whether this had been private or public, she would have gotten what she's asking for anyway. which is an incited response, attention. the only real difference between this being public and private is the number of people expressing their disdain towards her behavior. buuuut at this point, i don't think she can possibly be categorized as a troll when her focus is solely to target and harass one member, in a borderline obsessed sort of way. maybe half-troll.

the thing is, no one's disallowing her to have her say. i understand that she may feel uncomfortable defending herself when the entirety of this forum is reprimanding her for her behavior. but a number of people (tiff included) have tried to help her. and i don't think it gives her the right to be allowed more leeway in the situation because she may be possibly unstable/have a complex. she may not be aware of what she's doing, but that shouldn't restrict anyone from calling out on her actions either.

and like i said, this has been ongoing for months. the mods have tried to resolve the situation by giving tiff and yoshi a balanced resolution, but that clearly hasn't worked. and while i definitely agree that no one should be directly insulting her, i don't think she's being "ganged" up on, at least for the most part. i feel that the only reason why the mods are paying more attention to this situation now as well is because people are expressing their grievances towards her behavior. :/ that said, if this current issue were a private matter between the mods, tiff, and yoshi, i doubt nothing would have been resolved, evidenced by how long this has been going on...

 

[Lumina]

Just to put out there, I do take it personally when someone I'm friends with is harrassed, sorry.

This. Even when I didn't intervene right away...in fact I never had an argue with this girl. In no way have I acted hostile towards her in the past not here, not outside TLS. I even told her that we weren't friends but that I was willing to give her a chance... despite the things that she's been doing to my friend. I never got my nose on it...not even once. And if I am getting in the middle of it now its because is too much. I mean I know we all have our troubles but if my friend is feeling depressed, having personal troubles with incredibly low self esteem... I'm sorry. But I just can't stand behind the lines while I see stuff like this happens. As other people have said I won't jump on her throat if she decides to ever speak in. I am the kind of person who always likes to hear both sides of the story...tho' I've been hearing her side of the story for some quite time now.

Tiff was one of the few users who gave me the opportunity to feel accepted, and like a community. She has gone through her own stuff and helped me with my own. And I would've left things calm down... but as Kripey says when someone is constantly harrasing one of the most important girls I've ever met online...sorry...but I do take it personal.

 

[Dawnbreaker]

First thought after reading that entire thread: That's an hour of my life I'm not getting back.

I repeat what I sad: get rid of her. If a person has multiple instances of breaking the rules, they should be banned. The staff might have been remiss in doing the proper course of action and giving her a certain set of warnings but unless this girl is really off her rocker she must have figured out her behaviour was inappropriate by now. Evidence has been given that she's harrassing Karkat, and she shows no sign of stopping so why bother with her? The idea of a member on a forum is of a person who contributes more to the forum than they cause of grief to the forum. This girl obviously is in the negatives of anything constructive or good so let's go without her?

And yeah, I'm surprised by the behaviour of some of the staff here. I really do think the staff are stellar here because trust me I wouldn't bother with the place otherwise. But it's like you guys have all go soft or lazy or whatever, as if you don't care about the place anymore. And that is disheartening. Arse yourselves to care, ffs.

Anyways, I know my intitial post was retarded but I'm not sorry for it. It was not nearly as wordy as I usually am but I was late for a meeting and felt being direct was best. I understand that not everyone agreed with that but oh well. Sometimes saying the truth should just be that.

Also, this is a public issue. Get over it. Once it was made public, it stays public. People will talk about it whether you slum it or not.

Also, also, I was not encouraged by anyone to jump to Karkat's defeanse. I'm not even close friends with her. I barely know her. But I feel, especially considering my history, that a person should be able to go to a site, post on a forum, talk to their friends without some full-on retard stalking their every move.

I should have said tl:dr but oh well, you read it now.

 

[Makoeyes987]

Sorry for the lack of response while all this went down initially, but I've read it now, and seeing how bad this has gotten and reading up on all the concerned posts, I really have to say that she has to go. I'm definitely in favor of a banning here.

This shit's gone on too long, and she's been warned (maybe not directly through an infraction) and told to quit this. If she's this disruptive and STILL harassing members over this shit, something's got to stop. We can't keep pushing this back anymore.

 

[Cookie Monster]

Yeah, I have no problem eating my words here. Originally, I thought the girl had not been counseled by staff, which is why I felt uncomfortable banning her right away. But, I have since heard that Tenny PM'd her telling her to stop. As I said in staff, that's as good as a warning in my book. However, I'm still going to stand by my decision in giving her the infraction, and if she contacts Celes again, we drop the anvil. But, if a ban is in order right now, I won't argue against it.

 

[The Twilight Mexican]

Road's sentiments on this speak for me as well. Now knowing that Tennyo spoke to her about no further contact at least once, her behavior amounts to wifully and knowingly disruptive. And it's created discontent in the community.

Drop the ban hammer.

 

[Joker]

I disagree.

Now that she's already been infracted, just leave her alone and if it happens again, bang. But it's unfair and, frankly, poor form to take action, then change that action a few hours later because of new information.

However, finding that communication about this was poor in the past does cause me to raise an eyebrow.