Finally realizing just how bad I fucked up with the best thing that ever happened to me, my ex, and with that realizing just how much time I've wasted not saying the things I want to say and not doing the things I want to do because I'm too busy worrying about consequences that probably won't even happen.
I'm sick of procrastinating, I'm sick of pretending that nothing ever bothers me, I'm sick of being so fucking lazy all the time, I'm sick of my goddamn self-confidence issues that stop me from showing people the real me, I'm sick of being my own worst enemy.
Not anymore. I'm done with it, all the fucking walls I've put up over the years, all the regret over not doing this or saying that, all of it. That's not the way I want to live my life and I'm fucking done telling myself that it'll all magically get better just because I'm a good person because it won't unless I get off my ass and do something about it.
And I'm fucking pissed it's taken me this long to get my head out of the sand.